Delicious As Sin

Chapter 20

By PinkSunRise

       

Harry was aware of someone gently stoking his forehead and whispering softly to him as he awoke. His eyes flew open and he screamed. He sat up and had the urge to flee the room. He tried to resist as he was grabbed from behind and pulled against someone.

"Wha… what happened…?"

"We saved your sorry ass," Draco said bitterly, his gentle tone evaporating. Harry gazed around the room and realized he wasn't in the hospital wing. He had a feeling he had been here before. 'Snape's room,' he thought.

"Why aren't I in the hospital wing?"

"Because we couldn't have the whole fucking world knowing that their little angel has fallen from his pedestal, could we?"

"Draco! What the hell is your problem!?"

"My problem?" Draco purred dangerously and Harry shuddered, looking away. For as long as he had lived he had never been so scared. Tom had been so… so enraged. It was as if he had been possessed; he had always been gentle, always sweet but that... that had been something else.

"Tom.." he whispered softly.

"Oh your sick bastard…" Draco hissed as he backhanded Harry. Harry gasped as Draco pounced on him. He heard shouts as Snape tried to pull Draco off of him. He watched as Snape manhandled Draco into a chair and murmured a simple charm.

"Draco… he's not himself, he just awoke from a terrible ordeal," he heard Snape whisper as he smoothed Draco's hair back. Harry fell into his own thoughts; he had never heard Snape sound so gentle. He was brought back to reality as he tasted blood. 'Damn it,' he thought. The wound on his lip had reopened.

"Back to the land of the living Mr. Potter?"

"Yes, Professor."

Snape looked at him for a moment. "I'll return in a few moments I'm going to retrieve a few potions," he said removing the charm from Draco. "Don't kill him," he said firmly, looking pointedly at Draco, who nodded. Snape disappeared and Draco made no move towards Harry. They sat in silence for a few moments before Harry had had enough.

"Do you hate me?" Harry whispered softly.

"I could never hate you… that's the problem," Draco whispered softly standing.

"I… I don't understand…"

Draco sighed loudly and helped himself to Snape's brandy. He downed it in one gulp before turning towards Harry. He stalked towards him until he was inches away from his face.

"You’re not scared?"

"No I'm not."

"You should be."

"You wouldn't hurt me," Harry stated with as much certainty as he could muster.

"Oh Harry..," Draco laughed into his face. "I might not hit you, or curse you, but you have to remember I can still break you," he whispered.

"Draco," Harry began, but was abruptly cut off as Draco's mouth slammed down on his own. He tried to push him away, but Draco was relentless. Tears streamed down Harry's face and he wondered how his so-called friend could put him through this. Draco pried his mouth open and Harry cried out as he was shoved onto the bed.

"Don't you see!?" Draco screamed. "Can you fucking see now!? I've always been here for you, you bastard. I've always been there for you to talk to, to cry on, to scream at, I even saved your sorry ass. I don't even know why I saved you. You deserved for Tom to beat you, to rip you apart," Draco laughed and Harry began to shake. "I guess I thought there was some hope, you know? It was ridiculous the idea that the golden boy would want something as tainted as me, but no, NO! Our motherfucking hero had to go and fall for the DARK LORD, the one who killed his parents, the one who slaughters everyday for the hell of it and our precious Potter goes and fucks him."

"Is that what it's all about!? That I didn't want you?"

Draco laughed and Harry shuddered. Harry watched silently as Draco stood and walked out of the room. He was vaguely aware of the door being slammed shut as he turned to his side.

"You broke his heart," Snape said softly.

Harry looked up startled.

"I didn't see you come in."

"It's my room."

At this Harry feel silent and looked away.

"I… thanks for saving me," he said.

"Don't thank me, it was Draco who came to us," Snape said simply as he walked forward with a tray of food and several vials. Harry shifted to the side as Snape sat down with the tray.

"Are you hungry?" Snape asked gently.

"Why are you being so nice to me?"

"Would you rather I not?" Snape asked, the iciness seeping back into his voice.

"No.. I mean… did I make the right choice?"

"I'm not one to answer that question."

"I said I wanted to leave and Tom was enraged. I come here and Draco hates me."

"You hurt them."

"It's not my fault!"

"Whose fault is it?"

"It's not mine, damn it!"

"In answer to one of your previous questions, the only reason you are here, Mr. Potter, is that Albus asked me to bring you here, not because I brought you here out of the kindness of my cold heart. Don't overstep your boundaries," Snape said.

'I shouldn't have come back,' thought Harry. 'I should have just stayed.'

"I know exactly what you're thinking Potter. You want to go back and it's written all over your face, but you made your choice and there's no turning back. Stop trying to find a way to run, and face the consequences of your choice."

"Fine," Harry said simply and made a move to sit, but winced as he felt a searing pain through his leg. 'What have I done…' Harry thought.

"Draco got to you worse than I thought…" Snape murmured as he produced his wand from his cloak and whispered a spell.

"I… thank you, again."

"There is no happily ever after Potter."

"I made the right choice."

"Are you certain?"

"I will kill him. It was stupid of me to let myself believe his fucked-up lies. I let him get inside my head. I let myself believe that something that filthy and disgusting could love me. He slaughters without mercy everyday. Draco was right. I am a sick bastard."

"A noble choice, Potter, putting the cause above love."

"Isn't it the right thing to do? No I know it’s the right thing to do."

Snape didn't respond but rubbed his arm slightly and Harry knew. He knew why Snape was so cruel to him. He had his whole life ahead of him and he was going to blow it all. Everything he had going for him, his friends, and the people who cared about him. He hurt everyone who cared about him.

"What have I done…?" Harry asked tears collecting in the corner of his eyes. He brushed them away roughly with the corner of his sleeve. 'I might as well drown myself,' he thought.

"I don't know Harry I don't know…"

"Damn it!" Harry hissed as the tears overflowed.

"It's okay to cry," Snape said softly brushing a thumb over Harry's cheek.

"I'm not supposed to be scared of anything!"

"You're not perfect, no one is. We're all beaten and broken but we get up everyday and fight again."

"I'm supposed to be perfect…"

"Perfect?" Snape snorted and Harry gave a hurt look. Snape bent down until he was inches from Harry's face. "Perfect? You will never be perfect, Potter. You're tattered and used. You bite your nails when you get nervous, your back is littered with scars and dark bruises, your hair is always tangled, you look filthy and disgusting, your glasses make you look like an insect that needs to be stepped on. But you know what? That makes you human, it makes you alive. We strive for perfection and you know what happens when we would do anything to get it?" Snape hissed and he thrust his arm into Harry's face. The dark mark stood out against his pale skin like an ugly deformity.

"This, this is what happens," Snape finished pulling his arm away.

"So you're not perfect, who gives a fuck? You made a mistake and now you're working to fix it," Harry said.

"Can you try and destroy evil when evil is twisted around your very existence?"

"Yes! Yes you can!"

"Then I've taught you everything you need to know," Snape finished triumphantly.


Return to Archive | next | previous