By J. Marie
Warning!!!!!!!! This is a lemon yaoi fanfiction starring Seifer Almasy and Squall Leonhart from Final Fantasy VIII, and featuring supporting roles by, um, well, everybody. It is rated NC-17. If you guys don't know what yaoi is, or how old you need to be to read this story by now, you are truly a stupid person. And if you are said stupid person, allow me to give you one final piece of advice. Don't breed. Spare humanity the suffering of the continuity of your bloodline. With that said, I would like to say thanks to a lot of people before I write this story. Damn, I sound like I'm taking an Emmy home or something. Anyways, I would like to thank Dark Angel Genesis, who I don't really talk to anymore, but I would still like to thank her. A lot of these characterizations are inspired by her own. And Selphie's "little touch of sunshine" line came straight from Dark Angel Genesis' mouth (it comes later in the story). I would also like to thank Scarlet Fever, who wrote this awesome story called "Somewhat Damaged" on her site and I read it. Not only did I enjoy it, but I was bitten by the Seifer x Squall muse again. Gods, I love this pairing. I would also like to thank SorceressKnight, my new, and much harried, assistant. He works really hard, guys. This is a truly nice person. I don't deserve help like this. With all my thanks said, I would now like to prepare you for this story. Not only will this fic be filled with romance, angst, hot lemony sex, and my own sly sense of humor (I wonder if anyone else thinks I'm funny?), but I will be Rinoa bashing. I'm gonna rip her up one side and down the other. And I'm gonna enjoy doing it. I'll do a little Selphie bashing for good measure, but Rinoa is going to get crucified. *wicked grin* The story takes place six months after the end of Final Fantasy VIII and has nothing to do with my other FF8 stories. Oh, Dirk and Madison make a return in this story, but they're not father and son in this story, so don't worry. And this story will be long and in a few chapters..... So don't worry, the bashing may not be immediate, but I'll get meaner and meaner.....
"Has anyone seen the other boot that looks like this?"
Squall Leonhart blinked at Quistis Trepe, who was standing shoeless in her doorway, holding up a suede, high-heeled, ankle-high boot. The rest of their "gang" was with him, waiting for the SeeD instructor to come out and join them. She had been rummaging around in her room for the past ten minutes.
"For Christ's sake, Quistis!!! Aren't you ready yet??" Zell Dincht whined, punching air in annoyance.
"I can't find the other boot. I'm missing one of every pair of shoes I have!" Quistis complained, sighing, which caused her straight blonde hair to ripple about.
"Shoe thieves? You can't be serious........" Irvine Kinneas said skeptically.
"I'm perfectly serious! I have no decent shoes to wear! All my nice ones are missing!" Quistis sounded exasperated.
"You know..... I think your groupies are at it again...." Irvine said thoughtfully.
"Why do they do this to me?? I'm not Jodie Foster! Why must I be stalked?" Quistis cried, looking frustrated. She was dressed to the nines, in a short strapless black dress. She had on a single string of diamonds on her neck and small diamond earrings. Simple, yet elegant.
"Good thing you're not Jodie Foster. If you were, Laguna's life would be in danger...... Why don't you wear some of Rinoa's shoes?" Zell suggested, tapping his foot in impatience.
Rinoa Heartilly was hanging off of Squall's arm, a dreamy look on her face. Squall gently shook his arm to get her attention. Rinoa looked up at him and smiled wide.
"Rinoa... loan Quistis those black platform dress shoes you have. You never wear black, so you never wear them," Squall said quietly, wanting to get going.
Rinoa was wearing a form-fitting blue dress, with a slit up the thigh. She had on a pair of blue high heels, and looked like she was going to the prom. "But Quistis' feet are sooo much bigger than mine....." Rinoa pouted.
Quistis sighed, looking a little gloomy. Quistis was extremely self-conscious, and Rinoa always made her feel inadequate. "It's alright... I can look again...." the blonde suggested, coloring slightly at the comment about her feet.
Squall, Irvine, and Zell said "NO!!" in unison, surprising each other. Selphie Tilmitt giggled behind her hand, her green eyes sparkling in delight.
"Look, Rinoa's room is just next door, so just go in there and get the shoebox on the bed," Squall sighed. He had bought the shoes, hoping it would encourage Rinoa to wear something other than white or blue clothing.
Quistis nodded and went into the room next door. Rinoa pouted and glared up at Squall. "Those are Gucci...." she whined.
"I know. I'm still paying for them," Squall sighed.
Qusitis came out in the shoes, smiling smugly. The shoes fit perfectly. Rinoa chose not to comment on that, since they fit her perfectly too.
"Quistis, you really should wear your hair differently..... Especially in that outfit......." Rinoa chose to degrade Quistis about instead.
Quistis touched her hair, which was in an elegant french twist. She looked worried.
"You're fine, you look great... Let's go......" Squall said hurriedly, knowing Quistis would run in her room and fix it. He wondered again why Rinoa found it necessary to pick on Quistis all the time. And why Quistis let it get to her.
The group walked down the halls of the Esthar Presidential Palace, heading towards the big ballroom. Laguna Loire was holding a big party for all the SeeDs, in celebration of the clearing of Tear's Point. SeeD presence had cleared out all the monsters that had roamed there, largely due to the superb combat skills of Squall, Irvine, Selphie, Quistis, and Zell. They had been invited to stay the night, given rooms, and were all guests of honor at the ball.
Squall winced a little when he entered the room, finding the room crowded. He hated crowds. Rinoa giggled, absolutely adoring all the people there. Selphie yanked Irvine out onto the dance floor and they began to dance almost immediately. Quistis stood at the door nervously, her eyes darting about, before she found a chair and sat down, watching everyone else. Zell rushed off to the banquet tables, intent on finding any hot dogs. Squall headed off to where Laguna stood.
"I wanna dance, Squall!" Rinoa cried, her pink lips tugging into a pout.
"I would like to visit with my father first, if you don't mind," Squall sighed. He found that lately everything Rinoa said to him sounded like a whine or a pout.
Rinoa sighed. "Fine, fine....." she grumbled.
Laguna turned when he saw Squall and Rinoa, grinning ear to ear. At his side was the lovely Ellone, dressed in an elegant green gown. Laguna hugged Squall as soon as the brunette got in range, causing Squall to wince. He didn't really liked open displays of affection from Laguna. He wasn't quite used to the idea of the man being his father.
"Squall! Rinoa! Hi!! How are you guys doing? I'm so glad to see you! You both look great!" Laguna gushed, giving Rinoa a hug as well. Squall wondered if Laguna liked her only because she was Julia's daughter.
Rinoa blushed and gave her most charming smile to the effeminate president. "Thank you, Laguna.... I'd swear I'd think you were Squall's brother if I didn't know any better," she said. Squall groaned inwardly.
Laguna laughed. "Well, he's so serious, you'd think he was my father if it weren't for my laugh lines," Laguna giggled, smiling at his son with obvious pride.
"Well, at least you have laugh lines. Squall's going to get frown lines when he gets older," Ellone teased, giving her surrogate little brother a squeeze. Squall smiled at her, always pleased to see his beloved "Sis". Rinoa giggled from behind her hand.
"I'm so proud of you, Squall! You and your friends have been doing a wonderful job! Between defeating Ultimecia and clearing Tear's Point, you guys have got to be ready for the history books! I'm so proud to have you as my son!" Laguna gushed, giving Squall another bear hug. Squall gasped for breath.
"Thanks, Dad..." Squall choked when he was released, surprised at the slender man's strength. Laguna grinned at him paternally.
"Keep this up Laguna, and you're going to kill your only child with all those hugs," Kiros Seagill grinned, coming up beside Laguna and Squall. He was Laguna's long-time friend and Vice President of Esthar.
"Ah, he's a Loire! He can handle it!" Laguna cheered, his grin as childish as ever. Ellone and Rinoa giggled.
Kiros shrugged, nodding to Squall in greeting. It amazed Squall how well both Laguna and Kiros kept their age, looking as good as men half their age. Squall nodded back, the conversation between Kiros and Laguna fading to the background. Rinoa and Elle were talking amongst each other, giggling and giving Squall and Laguna pointed looks. Squall felt his eyes drift over the party, watching everyone there.
Selphie and Irvine were still dancing, laughing like fools. Zell was stuffing his face full of hot dogs. Ward Zabac, the Secretary of State for Esthar, and Laguna's other old friend was sitting by the band, enjoying the music. Nida was slow-dancing with Xu, despite the fact that the music was not slow. Cid and Edea Kramer sat quietly, eating dinner with each other. Squall rested his eyes on Quistis, easily the prettiest girl at the party, yet who was sitting by herself in the corner. Squall never understood why men didn't flock to her, like they did lesser beauties like Rinoa or Selphie. He himself wondered why he never found her attractive. Perhaps it was her maternal nature. Or the fact that she was very shy around men. The only man she had even remotely made any overtures to was Squall himself. Squall felt bad for the stately blonde. There seemed a familiar sadness in her deep blue eyes. A sadness he knew well.
Squall focused back in on Kiros and tapped the tall, handsome black man on the shoulder. Kiros turned from his chat with Laguna, raising an eyebrow. "Question, Squall?" Kiros asked.
"Yes, actually. You're single, right?" Squall asked bluntly.
Kiros grinned a little wickedly. "Yes, I am. But I think you're a little young for me.... Besides your father here might get upset," Kiros chuckled, causing both Ellone and Laguna to crack up. Rinoa looked a little confused, not getting the joke.
Squall blinked, and then blushed. "No, no... Not for me. I was just wondering if anyone would get upset with you if I asked you to dance with someone," he said quickly.
Kiros raised a graceful dark brown eyebrow. "Really? So it's alright if I dance with your girlfriend, then?" Kiros grinned wolfishly at Rinoa, who blushed and giggled.
"No! Do you see that blonde in the corner? The beautiful one?" Squall sighed, pointing out Quistis.
Kiros' eyes rested on her, appreciating her elegant beauty. "She's a little young for me too, I'm afraid," Kiros grinned.
"Could you please ask her to dance with you? Hang out with her a little? I think she's really lonely, and she's very shy around people she doesn't know. But thanks to Ellone's time dreams, Quistis knows you. I mean, Irvine has Selphie, and Zell has his hotdogs..." Squall realized he was talking a lot.
Kiros blinked, studying the young man's face before him. Squall looked so much like Laguna, having the same elfin features, the delicate ethereal beauty. But Squall had always seemed so cold, so distant. But here he was showing empathy for someone else's loneliness. It touched Kiros. And getting him to spend time with a beautiful young woman wasn't exactly torture.
"No problem. Hope she likes black guys.... But why ask me?" Kiros shrugged.
"You're intelligent. Quistis is intelligent. And I don't hate her enough to ask Zell," Squall said, with the slightest hint of a smile.
Kiros laughed. "Quistis, eh? Interesting name. I'll see if I can't get the wallflower to detach herself from her corner," he laughed, heading off in her direction.
Rinoa was pouting again, and stood next to Squall, giving him the evil eye. He wondered what he'd done wrong now. She remained silent, fuming to herself.
Laguna grinned, and Squall noted with mild surprise as he took Ellone by the hand. "Well, speaking of dancing and hanging out, let's do that ourselves.... I want to party!" Laguna grinned, whirling Elle around as he went on the dance floor, causing the pretty brunette to laugh.
"They're awfully close," Squall remarked sourly. He always felt jealous around Laguna. Somewhere in the back of his head, he was throwing a hissy fit about Elle liking Laguna better than him. He pushed the childish thought aside and gave Rinoa a smile.
She smiled back, whatever she was pouting about disappearing. "Can we dance now?" she asked, excited as a little girl.
"Alright," Squall sighed, glad he wasn't alone anymore. After all, he had the love of his life. The One. Miss Right. And she was here, in his arms. They were dancing. It was meant to be.
So why did he still feel lonely, deep in his heart?
"Hey, beautiful. Why are you sitting here all alone?"
Quistis looked up from the napkin she was folding and stared at the tall, slender black man in front of her. "Um, I...... hello...." she said with surprise.
Kiros grinned down at the blonde. "Hello, yourself. You look bored," he smiled, sitting down beside her.
Quistis shrugged, watching Rinoa and Squall dance together sadly. "I guess," she answered, fiddling nervously with her necklace.
"I see..." Kiros breathed, following the blonde's gaze to the dancing couple. "You like him?"
Quistis started, not used to be talked to so honestly, especially about her own feelings. She looked over at Kiros, swallowing. Someone was actually paying attention to her. Not one of her groupies, who only worshipped her from afar, but never actually got to know her. Her friends considered her almost insignificant. But someone was talking to her. Acknowledging her existence. So there was life on this planet after all.
"I..... use to. I guess I still do....." Quistis sighed, turning her face from Kiros as it reddened.
Kiros nodded his head. It was making a lot of sense now. "I've seen you fight, Quistis. You're a fine warrior. An excellent teacher. But here we are, in real life, and you're sitting in the corner, by yourself, trying to hide yourself from the world. Why?" he asked. Kiros always got straight to the point.
Quistis stared at Kiros in astonishment. "I...... I'm not a good teacher. My license was taken away. They said I wasn't leader material. As for the hiding part, I'm not really. People just don't notice me. They make me nervous sometimes. Actually, a lot of the time. I guess I'm just not what they want..... I'm not pretty and popular like Rinoa, or cheerful and energetic, like Selphie......." Quistis responded, finding herself baring her heart suddenly to an almost complete stranger.
Kiros studied the girl. She had the self-esteem of a sick dog. He felt his degree in psychology kicking in. "Sounds like you're depressed, beautiful. And that you have social anxiety......." he said.
"I know..... The medication hasn't started working yet... I'm a mess, aren't I?" Quistis smiled sadly. "You can leave now, if you like."
Kiros looked sharply at the elegant blonde as she turned her body away, figuring that once he knew that she had emotional baggage, he was gone. "Why would I want to leave? Do you know how much perfect people annoy me? What do you mean, not pretty like Rinoa? Rinoa's pretty, but you're beautiful. She doesn't hold a candle to you. Selphie's cute, but after speaking to her at length, I need an insulin shot. Don't be so hard on yourself," he smiled.
Quistis blinked and turned slightly, staring in surprise at the tall black man. She smiled at him. It had been a long time since anyone had tried to make her feel better. She studied Kiros' strong, dark features. He was very handsome, tall and sinewy, like a dancer. His long hair was in thin braids, and his mocha skin made him seem exotic.
Kiros grinned. Quistis was more interesting than he thought. He wanted to make her smile more often. It was truly a beautiful sight. "I came here with a purpose, beautiful. I want to dance, and you're going to dance with me," he smiled, standing up to full height and held his hand out to her.
Quistis felt elated. Finally, someone wanted to dance with her. "Alright....." she smiled, taking his hand.
Squall blushed furiously as his legs were spread apart. Seifer smiled at him encouragingly, admiring the beauty the sultry brunette held between his legs. Seifer leaned over and kissed Squall's mouth slowly, causing the sexy brunette to relax, as his legs were spread as wide as they would go.
Seifer relinquished Squall's mouth and bent down, between Squall's legs. Squall was panting slightly in anticipation. Seifer put his gunblade roughened hands on Squall's creamy thighs, placing slight pressure to keep them wide apart. He blew softly on Squall's cock, watching with a satisfied smile as it grew hard in seconds. Squall cried out when Seifer took him in his mouth, sucking gently. He moaned as the sucking became more intense, causing his lithe body to arch in pleasure. Seifer sucked him like a lollipop, tasting precum on his tongue, knowing that Squall was going to come very soon. All of sudden, Squall's moans of pleasure changed to horrific siren wails......
Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!
Seifer Almasy awoke reluctantly, cursing at his alarm, which he promptly threw across the room at it's audacity to interrupt his dream. He groaned at his erection, and pulled down his boxer's to stroke himself, wanting to rid himself of all sexual tension before he headed off to the Garden. He closed his eyes, imagining Squall's hand on his dick, stroking him instead. He imagined the brunette's generous lips brushing across his ear, whispering........
Seifer cried out as he came, covering his hand in white liquid. He sighed grumpily, and crawled out of bed, heading towards his shower.
It was the same dream, every night. It had variations of course. As many variations as there were forms of sex. It was always about Squall. Usually, Squall naked. And Squall moaning like a whore while Seifer pleasured him in as many ways as his imagination would allow. And his imagination seemed limitless so far.
Seifer showered quickly, but cleansed himself thoroughly, and dried himself off. He chose his favorite cologne, Obsession, and sprayed himself. He headed back to his room for his clothing. Gray trenchcoat with his red cross symbol on each sleeve. Tight black shirt with a red dragon emblazoned on it. Tight black pants with red trim. Black platform boots, shined to perfection. He combed back his wet golden blonde hair, staring in satisfaction at the mirror. He was hot, and he knew it.
Nobody could resist him. Except of course the one person he wanted. He scowled slightly at the mirror and stomped from his hotel room. He got out the door before his two best friends stopped him.
"SEIFER. LEAVING?" Fujin asked in her loud voice, yet she never yelled.
"Why you leaving us and all, Seifer? We're a posse, ya know. You can't just go and ditch us, ya know," Raijin said plaintively.
Seifer sighed and smiled. He knew they were going to try and convince him out of it. "It's beyond the posse, guys. You know I love you like I would my own flesh and blood. But I did a lot of things wrong while Ultimecia had control of my mind. I've made it up to you. You guys got your fishing business now. You're settled in Balamb. But I'm not. I need to finish making things up. I have to go back to the Garden. I have to become a SeeD," he told them.
Fujin hung her pale head. "SEIFER. RIGHT. GOOD LUCK," she said seriously, clasping his shoulder.
Raijin smiled slightly. "You're really stubborn, ya know. I hope you make it this time, ya know. Knock 'em dead," the huge black man grinned, giving Seifer a crushing bear hug.
Seifer coughed slightly and hugged his friend back. "My intention is to knock them alive. Now could you please let me go before you crack my ribs?" the tall blonde snorted.
Raijin let him go and both his friend's gave him smiles of encouragement. They had been there for him when he was brainwashed by Ultimecia, and they were here for him now. Seifer reached out his arms and wrapped them around his friends' shoulders, squeezing them against his chest.
"Take care of each other. Now that I'm gone, you're the posse," Seifer whispered and released his closest friends.
Fujin grinned up at him, her harsh face softening. "SEIFER. COME BACK SOON," she said.
"You'll have a place here for ya when ya want to come back, ya know. Come visit us," Raijin intoned.
Seifer watched his friends leave with a wistful smile. He sighed and girded his loins, so to speak, heading off on the road to Balamb.
Despite the fact that he was back at work, Squall found the Garden far more relaxing than the party his father had thrown last week.
Squall stared blankly at the document before him. He'd read it at least five times and still couldn't remember what it said. He sighed inwardly and set it aside, taking another equally incomprehensible paper from his inbox. Being the new Headmaster of Balamb Garden wasn't exactly everything it was cracked up to be. He was bogged down in more paperwork and negotiations than a tax collector. He set the new document aside as well, and pulled out his desk drawer. Squall downed four Excedrin, and the glass of water on his desk. He reached for another paper, praying he would be able to concentrate on it.
It was a request for instructor reinstatement for Quistis. It was served by Kiros Seagill, with a petition signed by a hundred students of Balamb Garden. And quite a few full-fledged SeeD. Squall could make out Irvine, Selphie, and Zell's signature. He looked closer and saw that even Cid Kramer, the former Headmaster, and his Matron, Edea had signed it. Squall blinked, wondering why Kiros would mount such an effort to reinstate a girl that Squall had asked for him to dance with. Squall shrugged and signed the paper, seeing no reason why the intelligent woman wouldn't be able to become a teacher again. She had social anxiety, true, but she was on medication, and even so, it never impaired her ability to perform as an instructor or a warrior. Quistis would be a teacher again.
Squall was in the process of assigning her a class of near graduating students when his intercom beeped at him. He sighed deep and long and depressed the button. "What?" he asked shortly.
"Your one-o'clock appointment is here to see you, Headmaster," his secretary informed him.
Squall's eyes flicked over to the agenda he'd neglected to read, finding that he indeed had an appointment. With a Mr. John Doe. Squall blinked. "John Doe? What kind of bullshit is this?" he asked with annoyance, wondering if it was another of Zell's practical jokes.
"I'm sorry, sir, but the young man refuses to give you his name unless you see him," his secretary said, as monotone as ever. Squall wondered how anyone could be so bland.
"Whatever. Just send him in," Squall sighed. He might as well see who this John Doe person was and what he wanted.
Squall's door opened slowly, and a tall blonde walked in the door. Squall did a double take, assuring himself he wasn't seeing an illusion. He was unmistakable. Facial scar, crinkled slightly by his incorrigible smirk. Honey blonde hair. Gray trenchcoat with a red cross symbol. Tall, muscular physique. Seifer.
"Don't look so happy to see me. Calm down. Don't get so excited," Seifer smirked.
"I never expected to see you again. Especially here," Squall managed to say after a few moments.
"Surprise, surprise. Here I am. It's not necessary to kiss my feet just yet," Seifer said, his smirk never faltering as he sat in the chair across from Squall's desk.
"What do you want?" Squall asked, scowling at his childhood rival.
"There's a lot of things I want. I can think of two you can give me. But I'll settle for you readmitting me to the Garden as a SeeD cadet at the same level I was at before I left...." Seifer said calmly. There was so many things he wanted to say. So many things he wanted to apologize for. Yet he found himself easily falling back into his bully routine.
Squall was silent again for a few minutes. Seifer was betting that he was having another of his silent monologues. "Look, Seifer. We all know that Ultimecia was fucking with your head...... But there's still some bad blood..... Some people here don't really understand...." Squall said quietly. He had to admire the balls it took for Seifer to come back.
"I realize that Squall. I realize how badly I fucked up. Let me come back. Let me make it up to you. Give me a chance," Seifer said, suddenly not looking so tough, chewing on his bottom lip nervously.
Squall looked surprised, both at Seifer's nervousness, and what was the closest thing to an apology he could ever expect from Seifer Almasy. "Alright, Seifer. But you get no special privileges. You are on probation until you become a SeeD. You enter at the same level you were at. You will treat others with respect. No more disciplinary committee. No more scar exchanging. You're an adult now. And you will learn to take orders from me, and the others who were once you're peers, who have attained higher ranks than you," Squall told him in the most authoritative voice he had.
Seifer's eyes narrowed slightly and Squall could almost visibly see the rebellious blonde chafe at the restrictions, but he said nothing and nodded his head in assent.
"You will report to your old dorm tonight. Tomorrow morning you will report to Instructor Trepe's classroom, and take one week of refresher courses, before you begin your exams to become SeeD," Squall said in his same no-nonsense voice, and returned to penning down Quistis' class, including Seifer's name.
"So Trepe's a teacher again? How droll. I guess I'll go get settled in," Seifer grinned, standing up to leave.
"One more thing, Almasy," Squall said, not daring to look up from his desk.
"What's that, Leonhart?" Seifer asked calmly, reaching for the doorknob. It had went better than he expected. Squall had changed.
"Rinoa and I are very close. I'm going to ask her to marry me tonight. I expect you'll leave her alone?" Squall asked coldly.
Seifer's blood chilled for some inexplicable reason at those words. "Don't worry, Squally. I'm not interested in Rinoa anymore," he said quietly. It was amazing how quickly his infatuation of the Asian girl had dissipated after his ordeal with Ultimecia. His very memory of their summer together made his stomach churn.
"Then what was the other thing you wanted from me?" Squall asked.
"I suppose you'll figure that out one day. I mean, I've always wanted it from you. Ever since puberty hit," Seifer chuckled, leaving the office. He knew Squall wouldn't figure it out.
And indeed, Squall was baffled.
Rinoa had said yes before Squall finished his marriage proposal. She snatched the diamond ring from his hand and slipped it on, giggling and hugging him. She then pulled out her cell phone and called every last one of her friends to tell them the news. She called Squall's friends too. Squall thought he did a very good job of hiding his irritation. After all, she had a right to be excited. They were finally going to seal their union with marriage. Their love would be declared before the law, their friends and family, and the eyes of the gods. She had a right to call everyone and marvel over how much the ring must have cost him.
But money was no object. Squall spent the fortune he made as the Headmaster of Balamb all on her. He lived rather modestly. He bought her clothes, jewelry, expensive dinners, whatever she liked. She was a princess. He enjoyed doting on her, showering her with material objects of affection.
Squall stood in front of his door, opening it with a shaky hand. Rinoa was giggling next to him. She had asked to spend the night with him. They hadn't had sex yet, as whenever Rinoa hinted at it, Squall drew back, cold as ever. He was still a virgin and sex still made him embarrassed. The thought of being naked with Rinoa.... of doing things with Rinoa... made him uncomfortable.
He was aware he was suppose to be lusting after Rinoa like Irvine lusted after anything female. He never really felt lust before. Squall didn't understand the emotion at all. It was foreign to him. Sure, he would masturbate. Rarely. Squall often wondered if something was wrong with him. Every teenage boy in the Garden was obsessed with sex. Except for him. It's like his hormones had left him, and were now part of Irvine's incredible sexual drive.
Squall stepped in his room, and Rinoa shut the door behind her. She grinned up at him, dropping her jacket and handbag to the floor as she began to kiss him. Squall kissed back slowly, feeling the heat of embarrassment rise to his cheeks. He kissed her very rarely, and when he did he always felt like he was kissing a wet dish rag. The sound of saliva slurping made him a little queasy. But this was his fiancee'. He was suppose to be enjoying this. So he continued to kiss her.
Rinoa maoned and stepped back, quickly removing her white dress. She stood before Squall in her bra and panties, grinning. Squall swallowed, wondering what he was suppose to do.
Rinoa sighed. "You really are a virgin, aren't you baby?" she asked.
Squall nodded, turning redder in his embarrassment. Rinoa giggled and kissed him again. "That's soooo adorable. I'll teach you......" she said, looking lecherously at Squall. She began to tug on his clothes, and the pretty man let her remove his clothing. He was so pretty to her. So sweet. So strong. So silent. So cute. So innocent.
Squall felt cold when Rinoa removed the rest of his clothing. When she tugged off his briefs, he felt mortified. But he stood there like a good little boy, waiting expectantly for his next task.
"Take off my bra and panties, Squall.... You can touch me if you like...." Rinoa grinned.
Squall began to fumble with her bra. He removed it quickly, and stared down emotionlessly at her breasts. The thought of touching them seemed dull, but he did so, knowing she wanted it. Rinoa closed her eyes and moaned. He left her breasts to remove her panties, feeling dry in his mouth. He felt a a little queasy when she asked him to touch her between her legs, but as always, he did what she asked. Isn't this how loving couples were suppose to act?
Rinoa brought them both to the bed and began to explore his body. He lay there stiffly, feeling oddly violated. He was staring up at ceiling, wishing she would go away. He was feeling downright nauseous when she tried to rub herself on his limp cock. He felt cold and nauseous and dirty. He wanted it to stop.
"Squall......? What's wrong with you?" Rinoa's plaintive voice asked him, sounding irritated and disappointed.
"I... I'm not feeling so good, Rinoa... I think it's something I ate... Let's just wait until we're married, okay...? I want it to be special," Squall asked quietly, hoping he could buy himself some time.
"That's the first time anyone of the male gender has ever said that to me. But it's alright. I hope you feel better," Rinoa said, an audible pout to her voice. Squall heard the rustling of her clothing and the door open and close.
Squall ran to the bathroom, and vomited, knowing with dread that it wasn't the food that made him ill.........
Seifer walked into Instructor Trepe's classroom, whistling to himself. He had gotten some dirty looks from a few SeeDs, but ignored them and went along his business. The door whooshed open and he found himself facing a bunch of kids two or three years younger than he was. He headed over to Quistis' desk, watching the blonde woman lecture a young girl on the importance of feminine hygiene. Seifer stood off to the side until she was done.
"Seifer! Welcome back!" Quistis smiled at him, holding out her hand for his papers.
Seifer handed her his documents, and grinned at her. "Long time, no see, Instructor Trepe. Nice to see you got your license back," he commented. Quistis seemed so much more grown up now.
"Thank you. Nice to see you got the balls to come back. I was pleased to see your name on my roster. Squall left me email about you. You realize that you're going to have to deal with taking orders from a lot of us, don't you?" she asked, remembering Seifer's problems with authority.
"I appreciate your concern my behavior, but I'm a big boy now. I can deal," Seifer laughed.
"I hope for your sake that you can," Quistis smiled and gave him his seating assignment.
Seifer was placed in the back, behind a couple of boys. They looked to be about sixteen, and were rather attractive. One was a tall, slender redhead, and the other a short, muscular brunette. Seifer nodded to the boys as he sat down. He paid little heed to them as the class began.
Quistis was doing refresher courses for the written test next week. She went over fighting basics, explaining techniques and limit breaks. Seifer was bored and felt his mind drifting.
He was in the middle of a rather nice fantasy involving Squall and a tub of whipped cream, when Quistis' pager went off. She bade the class to wait, and picked up the classroom phone, talking quietly to the other person on the line.
"Alright, class, I have some news of some degree of interest to you," she said, looking stern, yet pleased about something. Seifer watched her, wondering who she was talking to.
"There have been some hate crimes here in the Garden. Despite the fact that sexual promiscuity is not permitted within the ranks of SeeD cadets, every last SeeD is allowed to make a choice for the sexual preference and not be ridiculed or picked on about it. The word "faggot" has been spray painted on people's doors, and hate letters have been delivered to certain classmates. This behavior has got to stop. If the perpetrator is found, he or she will be expelled from the Garden," Quistis said, glaring around the room.
Seifer found that most people were looking at the two boys in front of him. He looked over at them, noticing how close they sat together, and that the brunette's hand was resting comfortably on the redhead's thigh. He noticed how the redhead moved, his pretty clothes, and his make-up. Seifer blinked. These kids were the ones getting picked on.
He continued to look around the room, before Quistis spoke again, taking in his other classmates, as where he had ignored them before. He saw an extremely tall, lanky young man with pale skin and long black hair. He looked Oriental. The man was proud and about Seifer's age. He turned slowly to look at Seifer and favored the tall blonde with a twisted smile, as cold as Shiva's smile. Seifer felt his bowels turn to ice.
Two others sat near him, looking at Seifer as well. They were obviously twins, boy and girl, looking like male and female versions of the same person. They had rich purple hair, and almond eyes of the same color. They looked to be a few years younger than Seifer, about sixteen or so. They were both petite, yet looked as hard as stone. Seifer swallowed involuntarily.
He recognized all three of them of course. As much as he tried to forget, as much as he tried to push it away, he remembered. All three had been Galbadian students. He remembered the Oriental the most. He was still in the clutches of Ultimecia's mind control when he had taken over Galabadia Garden. He fought a lot of the students there. He remembered the tough battle with the Oriental. The Oriental boy had run away when Seifer got too tough for him. Seifer remembered them. That's why they looked at him with so much hate. They remembered him too.
His eyes drifted over to the young gay couple in front of him, and tried to forget about the raw hate the three Galbadians were directing at him. Seifer swallowed, trying desperately to calm his heart and concentrate on Quistis' voice. It was over. Ultimecia was gone. It wasn't his fault.
Yes it was.
No it wasn't.
But they thought it was.
"As an exercise to teach all of you tolerance and understanding, Squall has requested a guest speaker," Quistis was saying, "His name is Vice President Kiros Seagill, and will he will travel all the way from Esthar to speak to us on his lecture about the 'Psychology of Sex', particularly of a homosexual nature, since that seems to be where the hate is directed. Not only is he the vice president of Esthar, but he is a former Galbadian soldier, and has a doctorate in psychology. I hope that all of you listen well to him, and take his words to heart. The lecture will be held tomorrow at 10am. Tardiness will result in demerits."
The bell rang and the students got up to leave. Seifer stretched and yawned, trying not to look at the three transfer students from Galbadia. He glanced over at the gay couple and grinned at them. The redhead flashed him a coy smile, but the brunette gave him a wary look.
"Hi. Name's Seifer Almasy. Who're you?" he asked. Might as well make friends. And these two looked like they needed a protector.
"I'm Madison, and Mr. Smiles over here is Dirk," the redhead grinned, batting his eyelashes at Seifer.
Seifer smirked. Madison is what could on be described as being "on fire". He had an angular cut to his flame red hair, and frosted lipstick on. He wore a blue retro outfit, with blue lace and ruffles on the edges. He was tall and slim, and very effeminate. On the other hand, Dirk was short, shorter than even Zell. He had light brown hair, cut short, yet the bangs remained long. He wore a billowy brown coat, and what appeared to be beige, brown, and dark blue clothes beneath. He was pretty enough to pull off wearing the drab colors. Dirk was pretty, yet his sour attitude made him seem harsh, reminding Seifer a bit of Squall.
"Nice ta meet ya. I assume you're not part of Trepe's little groupies...?" Seifer asked with a grin.
"Oh no no no no no....... How repulsive... She's nice enough if you like breeders," Madison said with disdain, waving his blue-lacquered hand about.
Dirk sighed and kicked Madison lightly on the shin. "Aren't you the Sorceress' Knight?" the small brunette asked tactlessly.
Seifer visibly winced and then sighed. There was no hope for it. "Yes. I was. Now I'm a SeeD cadet," he said slowly, watching the couple's eyes.
Madison nodded, and Dirk shrugged. "So.... would you like to go to lunch?" Madison asked after an uncomfortable moment of silence.
"Yes, I would...." Seifer grinned, and Dirk glared at his red-headed lover.
Why don't you crawl back to your mistress like the worm you are, Sorceress' Knight?
Seifer swallowed at the graffiti sprayed across his dormitory door. Madison paled, but Dirk looked angry. "They do this kinda shit to us, too. Don't worry about them. They're just a bunch of Galbadian fuckwads..... Only reason they're still here is because they're friends with Irvine Kinneas, and everybody knows he has it in good with the headmaster," Dirk said, spitting.
"There's a difference between what they do to you, and what they do to me..." Seifer said quietly, going into his room. Though it was a double, the other room was unoccupied.
"What's that? Hate is hate....." Madison said.
"I deserve it," Seifer said, his voice sad.
Dirk put a hand on Seifer's arm, having to reach up to do so. "The tall Oriental's name is Loki. The freakazoid twins are Heaven and Hades. Heaven and Hades are harmless on their own, but when they're with Loki, things get rough for the rest of us. Maybe they'll go to that lecture and learn something," he said quietly, sensing Seifer's hidden turmoil.
Seifer shook the black mood off of him. He was better than this. Better than all of them. He was Seifer Almasy. They could do what they wanted, but he would be strong.
"I doubt it, Dirk," Seifer said with a small smile. "But we can hope. They remember me for what I did wrong, when I was under Ultimecia's mind control...... But I'm going to show everyone that I can do the right thing too. I came here with a purpose. I will be a SeeD. Not even they can stop me."
Dirk and Madison nodded, watching Seifer head into his room. They headed back to their room, not even noticing that they were being watched.....
Seifer sat down next to his new friends, looking around the auditorium. Quistis was doing roll call, standing up front. Xu was standing off in a corner, and to Seifer's surprise she nodded in his direction. Selphie was bouncing around the room, yelling out to Quistis who was there and who wasn't. Irvine was sitting up front, a group of girls around him. No doubt recounting some false tale of heroism he performed, Seifer remarked to himself.
Selphie bounced past him. "Oh, Seiferitisreallygreattoseeyou!! We'vereallyreallymissedyou!! Iknowyoucandoitthistime!!" she babbled, calling his name to Quistis. Seifer blinked, only picking up on part of what she said, but noting that she didn't seem angry. It pleased him that none of the people he used to go to school with seemed to be upset with him.
Zell was sitting up front, as well, sitting next to his librarian girlfriend. The spikey-haired blonde glanced in Seifer's direction at Selphie's loud yell, and nodded to him, giving him the thumb's up sign before returning his attention to his girlfriend. Seifer damn near fell out of his chair at that. After all the times he'd picked on Zell...... And now Zell was encouraging him. It seemed so unreal.
Seifer's breath caught when Squall strode into the room at his usual slow, steady pace. Squall was wearing an unusual military outfit, with interesting designs. He still wore his spurs, and his jewelry. Squall's chocolate brown hair was tousled, as usual, and his blue-gray eyes scanned the room, giving Seifer an almost imperceptible nod. Seifer nodded back, trying not to think of how nicely the cut of Squall's uniform molded to his lean body, how much the way Squall walked turned him on, or how perfectly shaped Squall's ass was.
Seifer forced himself to tear his gaze away from the beautiful brunette. He noticed a tall, sinewy black man following Squall, wearing Estharian robes of office. The man was handsome, a strange sort of strong delicacy to his dark features. He looked to be in his early thirties, but Seifer knew he was forty.
Squall took the podium as a hush fell across the room, and Seifer recognized Squall's outfit to be the SeeD commander uniform. Cid never wore them. The tall black man stood to the side, and Seifer noticed him smile at Quistis, watched their hands brush together, and watched Quistis blush. This was too much.
"Attention, SeeD cadets. I'm sure your various instructors have told you why I requested Dr. Kiros Seagill here today. He is the vice president of Esthar, and a renown psychologist. I ask for your full attention and cooperation. Any noise or sleeping, will result in demerits. Consider this my warning to the cadets who have committing hate crimes here in the Garden. After this lecture, do not expect me to be so lenient. Listen well. You might learn something," Squall said, his voice monotone, yet commanding. Seifer shuddered slightly at the sound of his voice. Damn. Only Squall could pull off being cold and sultry at the same time.
The assembly clapped politely as Squall let Kiros take the podium. The tall black man watched the crowd for a few minutes, studying faces. "Good morning, Balamb Garden SeeD cadets.... A pleasure to be here today. Now I'm sure a lot of you came today because you heard the title of my lecture, the 'Psychology of Sex'. I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I won't be able to give you any advice on picking up chicks," Kiros said with a small grin. A few cadets tittered.
"However, I hope to help you understand homosexuality and even your own sexuality. Please keep in mind that this is general information. Every person is an individual, and not all people are going to react like the model I'm using. But most do. The teenage years are filled with hormones, and sex is big thing on all your minds. I don't know any teenager that doesn't think about sex all the time, except for Squall here. It's not his fault. He hasn't gone through puberty yet."
The audience was roaring in laughter. Squall looked annoyed. Seifer found it particularly funny, because he had made a remark to Squall once of that nature.
"Now I'm sure when you were about thirteen or fourteen, your hormones began to act up, and visions of naked people doing interesting things filled your young heads. I know they did mine. And I have the pictures to prove it. I'd show them to you, but your mothers asked me not to show them to you. They didn't want you to see them in the all together."
Kiros was already a hit, everybody was laughing their ass off. He had their attention.
"Now, despite what Squall may think, sex is actually deeply rooted in the mind of every human being. It's an instinct, a want, a desire. You can't escape it. You can push it away, pretend it isn't there, but you can never take away your primal desires. There are three carnal hungers that are embedded in the human mind. Thirst, hunger, and lust. Now when you start out, a wee little babe, your first sexual desire will be for your parents. Don't make faces at me, it's true. It's called the Oedipus Complex. By the time you are child you usually forget about it, or it's shoved away by social taboos forced on the mind of young children. Some still have Oedipal Complexes well into adulthood. That's why Irvine can't keep his attention focused on one woman for too long. They never compare to his mother."
The audience roared again, now at Irvine's expense. The slim cowboy made a obscene gesture in the direction of Kiros, but he was grinning.
"Now, when your Oedipal Complexes fade away, you're a child. Most children don't really understand the opposite gender at the time, considering them 'icky', as I'm sure you remember. Boys and girls are raised so differently, that they just don't see eye to eye. Children are very curious, though, and will happily play a rousing game of 'I'll show you mine, if you show me yours'. But they'll do it with anyone. Anybody remember wanting to marry their best friend? But they're best friend was the same gender as you? Children develop their first real crushes on the same gender. It's inescapable. It's not entirely sexual, but it's still an infatuation. I was six and my best friend was ten, but he acted six, when I dragged him over to my father and asked if we could marry each other. Now he's the President of Esthar, a father, and he still acts six. And no, we're not married."
The audience laughed again, but Squall's eyes snapped over to Kiros. Kiros and Laguna had been that close as boys?
"Now comes the tricky part. Once puberty hits, your hormones go crazy. This is usually around twelve or thirteen. Now, you are just getting used to the idea of the opposite gender. You're starting to understand them. But now you have these weird reactions to things you didn't before. You have a lot of sex dreams. Boys have a lot of wet dreams. But despite what society is telling you, most early pubescents start to dream of their own gender, fantasize about them. I see the looks of disbelief, and I see looks of shame. This is human nature. Everyone has these thoughts. I've yet to meet the heterosexual who never had a homosexual fantasy, or the homosexual who never had a heterosexual fantasy. A lot of young men and women develop crushes, sexual crushes, on other men and women."
A lot of the students were looking around. Some of them were blushing. Most looked uncomfortable.
"Don't be ashamed. It's how the human mind, and the body works. Boys, for some reason, are more prone to have homosexual fantasies, probably because of the male tendency to have deeply rooted hero worship of other men. After puberty really sets in, and the hormones really kick in, this fades, and your interest in the opposite sex picks up and the same sex interests is usually gone. You act like you don't believe me. I'll admit it myself. I had the biggest crush on my best friend, Laguna, when I was twelve. When I was thirteen, I had the biggest crush on his girlfriend. The way life goes. I'm not concerned about you thinking I'm gay, though I'm not, because I know I'm not. I'm comfortable with my sexuality.
"Now, even while a lot of pubescents are fantasizing about other members of their gender, they are still fantasizing about the opposite gender. It's mixed. Puberty is like a sort of cleansing ritual. It's where your mind, heart and body decide what your sexual preference is. Now some people claim to be gay from birth, or straight or whatever. I don't believe that shit. As a child you are still forming, and boys and girls are so intermingled and change from hating the opposite gender to playing doctor with them rather quickly. I think puberty is where that decision is made. It's not a conscious decision either. Your body, your subconscious mind, and even your heart will make that decision for you. Some people never really make a decision, and remain as they were as children, and are bisexual. Some choose on their own gender, making them homosexual, but most choose the opposite gender, making them heterosexual.
"Now, unfortunately, a lot of hate and social taboos exist in most regions. I know, as a Galbadian, that Galbadia is very sexually regimented. Everyone there must be straight, or they are evil. But Esthar is far more open-minded, and I learned what I know from them. Of course you might be able to attribute their acceptance of homosexuality to the fact that their former ruler, Adel, was a transvestite freak, but that's not my point."
The audience laughed nervously, as the air had gotten rather tense as Kiros' words struck home. Seifer watched Squall rub the scar on his face thoughtfully, a little paler than usual.
"Because of these social taboos, or their own fear, or their own confusion, a lot of homosexuals pretend to be straight. If they're a guy, they'll date girls, flirt with girls, act straight, the whole deal. Some homosexual men can even perform sex with a female, and vice versa, but most cannot, finding the act disgusting, violating and leaving them completely cold."
Seifer watched Squall pale and snap his chocolate head up to watch Kiros, looking frightened. Seifer wondered what he was thinking.
"This is a sad thing, as no homosexual person will ever be satisfied with someone they don't really desire, but it happens. But on the other side, you will find a lot of homosexuals who 'live the life' as they call it. Men who dress as women, flounce around, lisp... Women who shave their heads, wear dog collars, and put on men's clothing.... I'm sure you've seen them, know them, or heard about them. Most of these people are still not confident with themselves, and find themselves desperately screaming for attention in this manner. But if it pleases them to do so, let them. Who are we to judge? How is being gay wrong? Just because they're performing sexual acts with someone they can't breed with? Give me a break, how often do you use a condom? Have sex with someone for the pleasure, with no thought of reproducing? In that case, that philosophy would make all sex evil. They have sex for the same reason heterosexual people do. For pleasure, for love. You might think it's disgusting, but they think what you do is too. I think that makes us even."
The entire auditorium was silent. Kiros' words hit home. It gave most of them food for thought.
"Now I still see a lot of disbelief, a lot of rejection of what I'm saying. You don't believe me. I ask you to think about your childhood, your puberty. About your thoughts and feelings. Then my words will sink in, I think. But don't take just my word for it. I think I'm going to pick on someone," Kiros grinned, scanning the crowd with his dark brown eyes.
Seifer felt those eyes rest on him. "You there. Tall blonde sitting in the back, next to a redhead. Gray trenchcoat, red cross symbol, green eyes, and a facial scar. Let's pick on you today," Kiros grinned, motioning for Seifer to stand up. Selphie winked and handed him a microphone.
Seifer stood and took the microphone, grinning. This could be fun.
"You're the famous Seifer Almasy, aren't you?" Kiros asked.
"The one and only," Seifer grinned. Kiros knew he had been the Sorceress' Knight. But he didn't need to say it.
"You look like a nice heterosexual young man. So tell me, sir. As a child was there any other little boys you wanted to marry?" Kiros asked with impunity, looking sly.
"I actually have an excuse for that one. I've used a lot of GFs and I don't remember much about my childhood. But I can only imagine myself as some sort of child pimp daddy, I'm sure," Seifer grinned.
Kiros chuckled. "Fair enough. Do you remember puberty?" he asked.
"Yes, I do. Good thing you're asking me and not Squall," Seifer grinned.
The audience began to laugh again, and Squall looked insulted.
"Wonderful! So tell me... And be honest here now.... I was honest with you. Did you have any sexual crushes any other young boys or men?" Kiros asked.
"Oh, I'm not ashamed about it. Yes, I did."
"And some girls as well, I'm sure."
"That wasn't until later, but yes."
"So during puberty, you were still unconsciously debating about your sexuality. Perfectly normal. Care to give up any names?" Kiros grinned.
"That's pushing it. I can tell you that I still want him though," Seifer grinned.
A murmur went through the crowd. Seifer didn't care.
Kiros raised an eyebrow. "So when your hormones made your decision for you, when you basically, unconsciously chose your sexual preference, it obviously made you bisexual, I presume?"
"Actually, no. I'm a homosexual. But I dated girls, because at the time I thought it was wrong to be gay. But I don't care anymore. I'm not terribly well liked by my peers, so they can't dislike me anymore. I'm one of those rare homosexual men who can even shag girls. Very boring," Seifer grinned, adoring the way the auditorium went dead silent, the way people stared at him. A year ago he would've died of embarrassment. Now he basking in it.
Madison and Dirk were staring at him, both shocked. Seifer had just seemed like some perfectly heterosexual man to them. And to admit it in front of a whole crowd..... Not even they thought they could do that.
Squall Leonhart fell out of his chair with a loud thud. Kiros was flashing his white teeth in a wide grin. Selphie had stopped bouncing, and was staring at Seifer in slack shock. Irvine's eyes had crossed. Zell was staring, and his jaw was slapping against his knees. Quistis' eyes were wide as dinner plates. Somewhere in the crowd, Loki was sneering.
"That's very interesting. You don't look or act gay," Kiros said, not shocked.
"I know. I'm a top, why should I? But to be honest, the fruits don't really turn me on. I like them pretty, but not quite to the point of putting on a dress," Seifer grinned.
Kiros laughed. "How very fascinating. Thank you, Mr. Almasy."
Seifer sat down, handing Selphie back her microphone. She giggled at him and held her hand up in a fist, a gesture for gay pride. Seifer rolled his eyes and ignored her.
Kiros continued his lecture for another hour, but Seifer wasn't really paying attention to Kiros. He was watching Squall. He had dropped enough hints to crush a small town. And the way Squall was reacting to Kiros' lecture made him wonder. Squall was pale, and blushing. The beautiful brunette kept glancing in Seifer's direction, under his thick eyelashes, his blush brightening. Seifer wondered.
He wondered until the lecture was over and he was walking back to his dorm with Madison and Dirk, who were buzzing with information. He wondered in his room when they left him. He wondered as he took a shower, imagining Squall in it with him. He wondered when he went to the cafeteria for dinner, and Dirk was sitting alone, looking worried. He wondered when he and Dirk wandered the halls, looking for Madison.
He wondered the whole time until he and Dirk found Madison's crumpled form, blood trickling down the boy's face.
Then he had more important things to attend to.
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