Title: Crimson Transparency
Anime: Final Fantasy 8
Pairing: Seifer x Irvine
Rating: NC-17 for very explicit male/male sexual acts
Date: Copyright ©August 15, 2000 by Silver Rayne™
*Please send me feedback if you enjoyed this fanfic or would like to visit my yaoi site! ~ silver @ intrinsic.8k.com 

Crimson Transparency

Part One

By Silver Rayne

"Blast it! Damn those accursed SeeDs! What do they have that I donít?"

Seifer trudged through thick, murky marshlands, growling and complaining all the while. He hated to be bested by anyone, especially the likes of Squall Leonhart. Boy had Balamb Gardens ever screwed up when they let that menace of a boy join up! Not only was Squall too damn powerful but he also tended to gloat at the end of every battle. It might not look that way to outsiders but Seifer knew Squall too well, could hear him laughing out loud even when there was silence.

"When I get my hands on that pompous, arrogant, whelp of a boyÖ I swear IíllÖ"

A muffled sound halted Seifer dead in his tracks.

He looked towards the clearing up ahead, pulling his boots out of knee-deep seaweed infested water, being careful not to make any noise.

~Laugh at me, will you?~

Bright rays of daylight combed through the area, a light breeze rattled the tree branches high above his head. Seifer didnít care about nature nor would he be pausing to admire daisies, earthworms or any other such nonsense. He was set in his ways and focused on his goal.

~Kill Squall.. willÖ killÖ Squall.~

He chanted repeatedly in his head, an evil leer playing with the edges of his mouth until he broke into a full grin. This was the moment he had been waiting for ever since his last disgrace at Squallís hands. A chance for revenge. With any luck, the idiot would be alone and defenseless against a blind attack. Did Seifer give a damn about decency and honor? Absolutely not! One way or the other, he was going to send Squall plummeting into a deep, unmarked grave.

More giggling followed Seiferís train of thought, breaking off into a gasp of disbelief.

Had he been spotted?

Alas, poor SeeD boy seemed to be too consumed in his worldly affairs to take notice of such a stealthy predator. A breath of calmness escaped downhill to reassure Seifer. Everything was proceeding according to plan, if not better.

One more step and Seifer pushed himself over the hilltop to glance furtively around the clearing without disturbing the occasional bothersome squirrel or robin. The scene that greeted him nearly drove him over the edge towards utter madness. It was not Squall that had propped himself underneath a drooping willow to catch some shade in the receding afternoon. Seifer didnít even have to see a face to realize that his foe was not awaiting him. The posture was completely wrong, the proportions of limbs, weight and skin pigmentation were enough to seal the manís disappointment.

Seifer scratched at his head, wondering how he was supposed to react in this predicament. Maybe he hadnít been able to murder Squall with the business end of his gunblade but another member of SeeD would do just fine in Squallís place. Here sat a prime example of disobedience - Irvine Kinneas, defect member of Galbadia Gardens. The only remaining SeeD that had yet to vow his allegiance to Queen Edea and fight alongside him.

Still chewing on his bottom lip and brandishing a very threatening weapon, Seifer watched Irvine continue reading his book, oblivious to the danger nearby.

~What is that fool reading?~

Try as he might, Seifer could not decipher either the title nor the front-cover image from his position behind the tree. A man of Seiferís caliber was not afraid to risk exposure so he began to creep around the tree for a better angle. Besides, his curiosity defied any patience he may have had.

From his new hiding spot, Seifer could see Irvine Kinneas in full profile along with his book and any other nonessential article the boy had with him. Irvine leaned back against the tree trunk, lower back supported by his bundled up duster, yawning with one hand covering his mouth. He narrowed his eyes for a few seconds, adjusting them to the brightness that could not be blocked by his weeping willow. A minute later and he was stretching his long legs, rubbing at his eyes with two fingers on the bridge of his nose and untangling his ponytail from the bark of the tree. Then, as smooth as fluid melting in a boiling pot, Irvine returned to his reading. Picking up the book, creasing the cover back to relax the pages.

~How annoying.~

Seifer frowned, glancing from the book to Irvineís tranquil expression and back again. The only thing worse than not being able to slaughter Squall AND having to settle for a meager substitute was catching a grown man reading a romance novel. The horror of it! Seifer sighed, burying his face into his hands and pleading with someone to put him out of his misery. He had always known that Irvine was weirdÖ different than the others, but this? This was too much.

~To hell with it.~

Relenting to his own turmoil, Seifer prepared his gunblade, rolling his eyes at the next interval of quiet awe that Irvine seemed to emit. He didnít even polish his blade as he ritually enjoyed doing before charging out into the clearing, a war cry echoing for miles to come.

Irvine bumped his head on the tree, startled when a loud inhuman noise burst into his personal space. He was still hearing it before anything could be done about it. His first thought was to pick up his Ulysses and fire in all directions until the abhorred distraction ceased. That was before he remembered that this was his day off and picnics did not involve gunfire. Unless it included the mini-pistol strapped to his right ankle, which he sluggishly dove for.

"DIE! DIE! DIE!"

Seifer crossed the distance between them in one magnificent leap of his powerful frame, gunblade whipping diagonally in a merciless gesture of doom. He felt free as a bird, soaring amongst the clouds, talons ready to pierce the flesh of his quivering prey. His gray-blue eyes opened wider, laughing gleefully at Irvineís pathetic attempts to respond. Clumsy fingers fumbling with a buckle attached to a bared ankle from a rolled up pant leg, swearing from one end of the continent to the next.

Everything went in slow motion from there. Seiferís downwards slash and triumphant grin, Irvine raising a sleek pistol and firingÖ and also, Seifer tripping over Irvineís book.

A lone bullet graced the air, missing Seiferís left ear by a millimeter but leaving an impression of deafness to go with it. The book sent him hurdling onto Irvine, crushing the boy with his weight, burying his gunblade into moist earth and what remained of Irvineís unfinished lunch.

Nothing moved.

Neither of them spokeÖ until Seifer pushed himself up on his elbows to glare into Irvineís terrified face. "Do you see what youíve done now?"

"MÖme?" Irvine replied haughtily, shoving at Seifer with bruising force. "If youíre too incompetent to sneak up on your enemies, thatís hardly my fault."

"Sneak up on? Hah!" Seifer grabbed Irvine by his slender wrists and solidly locked them above his head. "Any member of the blasted traveling circus could waltz in front of you and you wouldnít even notice. Want to know why?" He shifted so he could seize both of Irvineís wrists with one hand, groping around frantically with his free one. "This is why!" He produced the book, still shouting indignantly at the squirming SeeD beneath him. "Donít they teach you anything in that little army of yours? Reading trash like this rots the brain."

Upon seeing his reading material thrust at him like discarded waste, Irvine could feel his cheeks flaring up with color. How dare this twisted psychopath criticize what he chose to do in his spare time!

"At least I donít fantasize about becoming a whipping boy for some queen twice my age! Youíre the sick one, Seifer Almasy!"

Irvine gasped when Seiferís hips applied pressure to his own, freezing his lower body with pain and anticipation.

"I donít fantasize about women, Irvine," he warned evilly. "The whipping part howeverÖ thereís something I confess to perfecting." Seifer leaned in closer, sensing a change in Irvineís attitude. "I must say that your insidious accusations are coming very close to enraging me. Squall must be teaching you his bad manners."

"Get the hell off of me!"

"Or what? Youíll seduce me into obeying?" Now Seifer roared with laughter. "Itís no wonder that Squall keeps you guarding his flanks during battle. You may be able to shoot Edea between the eyes during an extremely public performance but your fighting skills suck."

"Let me up and Iíll show you how well I fight!"

The older man considered the suggestion, actually releasing Irvine to see what he was capable of. "Very well, come and get me," he chuckled.

Irvine leapt to his feet, took one look at Seiferís bemused expression and attacked. Grabbing for fistfuls of the manís short blond hair, sinking his teeth into the hand that tried to smother him.  Punching and kicking in a vain attempt to copy Zell's kung fu prowess, yelling with outrage during it all. The more he fought, the more he realized that his attempts were only igniting Seiferís amusement. Tears of frustration formed in the corners of Irvineís eyes, trickling down the sides of his face once he was restrained again. He had never felt so helpless or hopeless before in his entire life.

"Let me go!" Irvine tugged at his captured wrists, bringing them close to his mouth to bite Seifer again. Sinking his teeth into thick fingers, crying with outrage when Seifer gripped him by his long ponytail, jerking his head back.

Instead of cutting Irvineís throat, Seifer whispered into the boyís ear, discovering that their short tussle had aroused him. "You want to suck on my finger so badly, I wonít stop you." Having said that, he forced his index finger between Irvineís pressed lips, into his warm mouth to seek out the tongue that evaded him. "Whatís wrong, precious? Donít you want to play?"

Tasting salt from the prying digit that squeezed inside his mouth regardless of how hard he bit down left Irvine reeling with humiliation. He couldnít prevent his senses from being assaulted by an acidic coppery flavor of blood mingling with the salt. No matter how hard he tried, he could not break free from the strength that was Seifer. This must be the reason why Seifer continued to fight regardless of the odds pitted against him. He was a tough man to challenge and negotiating was out of the question.

"Why Irvine, I had no idea that you were so sensitive."

Seifer released Irvineís chestnut hair, rubbing his thumb over a tear stained cheek while pushing his finger deeper between sore lips. His eyes met the violet-blue ones that defied his domination at every turn. Then his hand was sliding down Irvineís back, holding him still when he tried to bolt. Finally resting on the curved beginning of Irvineís firm buttocks, squeezing boldly through the material of his buckskin pants. Irvine yelped in protest, instinctively pushing up against Seiferís chest to escape those prying fingers. He sighed with relief when the finger in his mouth disappeared but cried out again when two hands roughly set to work manhandling him.

"If I canít kill you, Iíll break your spirit," Seifer groaned, delighting in the soft flesh that lay underneath the boyís shirt. "I havenít had anyone for so long. Itís so difficult for me to become interested in street trash that changes hands more often than I go through condoms."

"SeiferÖ please," Irvine begged, batting away the hand that lifted up his shirt. "There has to be somethingÖ"

"Something else you can offer me?" He finished. "What do you have that I could possibly want? All I see in you is the opportunity to demonstrate just how dangerous I truly am. Once Iím done, Squall will know fear by the example I make of you. Aside from that, I will cherish the pleasure of being the first to taint you with mortal sin."

"Nooo," Irvine moaned, choking on his own tears, struggling more vehemently as he was pushed to the ground. The moment Seifer got atop him, Irvine knew there was nothing he could possibly do to prevent what was about to happen.

The next thing that Irvine felt was Seiferís lips at his throat, kissing him, licking or nipping lightly with small bites. An impenetrable weight trapping his body, large hands moving up and down his sides, taking his shirt with them.

"Lift up your arms," Seifer commanded.

"I wonít!"

"Fine, be stubborn." The fabric tore away, buttons popped, leaving Irvine naked from the waist up. As soon as the chill of cooling air caused Irvine to shiver, he started to feel warm again as Seiferís palms gently stroked his flat stomach and taut abdomen into a frenzy of butterflies. He bit his bottom lip, clenched his fists and swung at the man, regretting it instantly when Seifer slapped him back. Irvine shut his eyes tightly, pretending that it didnít matter, that it was happening to someone else. Anybody but him.

"Iím sorry."

Irvine couldnít believe the gull Seifer had to taunt him like that. To abuse him so violently and then apologize. Those words sent wracks of pain down Irvineís spine as he began to cry, his entire being trembling from the intensity of his withheld emotions.

"I mean it Irvine. Iím sorry." Seifer repeated. His serious tone was accompanied by a pair of strong arms lifting Irvine into a sitting position. Cuddling him, rocking him slowly to ease the distraught youth. Anything to put an end to the sight of Irvine so upset and afraid. At times, Seiferís games could be taken too far and with extreme consequences but he didnít regret any of them as much as he loathed the way he had treated Irvine. "Please donít cry."

"Go to hell!"

Seifer smirked, caught off guard by Irvine hugging him fiercely, relying on his comforting gestures to survive. How ironic that the boy said one thing and did another, he was a walking contradiction.

"Are you feeling better now?"

"How do you expect me to feel after you hit me?" Irvine used the edge of Seiferís collar to dry his tears, half expecting the man to belt him again.

"Well, I assumed that you would be running off to tell Squall right now. Then he would come rushing after me with his troupe of do-gooders to avenge one of his fallen angels. How sad Squall is.  Honestly, Irvine, if I didn't know any better I'd say that you weren't trying your best to defeat me.  Then again... I didn't mean to take the game this far."  

Seifer stroked his fingers through Irvineís long hair, brushing back the wayward bangs that shielded two beautiful eyes from his vision. He had never before noticed just how big and expressive those eyes were, dark with long lashes and deep emotion. Or perhaps he had seen through them on many an occasion and chosen to ignore them. He always felt a certain inadequacy around the sharpshooter but only now decided to analyze it. At the start of their war, Seifer had long ago realized that Irvine was unattainable. He had spent hours altering his heart into a chunk of ice so that killing Irvine would not deter him from his dreams. How easy those lessons fell apart to reveal just how dedicated his heart sought out rejection.

A formidable silence ensued, disturbed only by Irvineís sniffling and Seiferís soothing words of comfort.

"I wouldnít."

"You wouldnít what?"

Irvine blushed when Seifer wrapped his duster firmly around his shoulders, cradling him as if he might break. "I wouldnít let Squall kill you."

That was a startling revelation.

"Why not?"

"BecauseÖ"

"That is hardly a good enough reason. After all the grief I caused you and your friends, I would think that killing me might alleviate some of your stress."

"You donít know how I feel!" Irvine reverted to tears once more, pounding against Seiferís restraining arms. "Everyone has high expectations of me. They donít think that I have any feelings. Squall has Rinoa and Quistis propositioning him, Zellís cocky behavior makes him a favorite of everyone and SelphieÖ I can only pretend. If anyone knew the person that I really am, theyíd hate me."

"Itís hard to keep everyone out of your life, Irvine. Believe me, I know. But that doesnít explain why you donít want me dead."

Irvine glanced up at Seifer, his expression accusing but gentle.  "It isn't like you to be so clumsy either.  If you really wanted me dead..."

"What are you trying to say?"

"Youíre my enemy. If Edeaís plan succeeds, the entire world might be destroyed by chaos. Iíll do anything I have to in order to stop you butÖ" Irvine gulped when Seifer tilted his chin upwards with two fingers.

"But what?"

"I like you."

Such a simple way to denounce a tsunami of emotions. "You like me?" Seifer puzzled over what he presumed to be Irvineís way of saying that he was idolized. His mistake rectified itself when he noticed Irvineís eyelashes fluttering against his cheekbones. The boyís breathing had become ragged, his eyes glassy and tender mouth all too pliant for Seifer to plunder. "I see," he said huskily, drawing Irvine even closer.

Their first kiss captivated both of them, forgetting everything that stood between them. Seifer swore at himself for not approaching Irvine earlier and for delaying what could have been. He tried not to be savage and maul Irvine like a brute. He failed miserably, devouring Irvine with kisses and caresses that left the poor thing panting and moaning desperately. And the light did dissipate, allowing only the faintest of rays to reach their secret hideaway.

"Damn Squall," Seifer muttered as he bruised Irvineís lips to gain access to his mouth for yet another passionate kiss. Savoring the deliciously sweet taste that he could associate with no other but Irvine. Holding his lover in an embrace so possessive that it served to create an even more intense dizziness inside of Irvineís brain.

"No SquallÖ" Irvine whispered softly, reaching back to unclasp his long hair and lie back on the damp grass, offering himself to Seifer. "Not tonight."

"ButÖ" Seeing Irvine spread out like that, waiting for him, created an unbearable ache in Seiferís glass heart. He was just too beautiful, too perfect, too innocent for what was to come. "Are you sure?"

"Yes."

The next few seconds guided Seifer through the tedious process of discarding his clothing, keeping his pants on for now. He lowered himself next to Irvine, wrapping an arm around the youth to keep him warm. They lay there like that, gazing up at the stars until Seifer began to trace a finger over Irvineís chest. Circling a nipple, pinching the other to taut readiness. His mouth descended on the pink flesh, enveloping it, gliding the tip of his tongue around the center before flicking at it. He heard Irvine whimper, clawing at the ground as the sensations became too much for him. Instead, Seifer grasped Irvineís hand in his own, squeezing it as his teeth clamped down on the nipple and began to suckle it. The boyís moans came more quickly and breathlessly, music to Seiferís ears as he splayed his free hand over the expanse of silken flesh that led below Irvineís belt.

Seifer nuzzled his head into Irvineís throat, an electrical charge shooting through his groin when a mewling sound reached his ears.

"Must youÖ do that?" He groaned.

Irvineís response was to whimper again, set afire by the hot breath burning his throat. He dug his fingers into Seiferís broad shoulders, clinging to him as a wave of pleasure drove itself lower.

It was amazing for Seifer to discover that a tiny sound from Irvine could do what even the most experienced hands had never been able to do to him before. He found himself lost to the abyss that he resented and desired at the same time. If the night carried on as he knew it would, there would be repercussions. Seifer didnít know whether or not Irvine had considered their future but he was too selfish to ask.

Without asking permission, Seifer crouched down lower and began to tug at Irvineís belt buckle. Sending the belt itself flying over his shoulder as he set to work on the zipper until he could carefully slide the pants down Irvineís legs. Pausing only to gain a trusting look from his lover, Seifer also made short work of the tight briefs blocking his path.

He spent long minutes just stroking his hands up and down Irvineís trembling body, letting his lover become accustomed to the feeling of unfamiliar hands in places that were usually off limits. Seifer allowed his hand to travel downwards while watching the inexplicable pleasure soar through Irvineís entire being. His fingers moved through Irvineís pubic hairs, a relative shade to the boyís lighter tints on his head. Lazily outlining the hollow of an inner thigh before brushing against the straining flesh that longed for his touch.

"PleaseÖ," Irvine begged feebly, surprising them both by grasping Seifer by his hair to push him lower.

"Donít be in such a rush, precious. We have the entire night ahead of us."

Seifer wanted to prolong their time together for as long as he possibly could. That way he could deny what would be waiting for them the next morning. Regret. They would both regret it. No matter how adamant Irvine might proclaim his interest in Seifer, the light of day would erase anything good or right that would definitely arise from their coupling.

A cool hand brushed along Irvineís erection again, noting the sharp intake of breath the cowboy took to alleviate the jolt that went through him. Seiferís fingers closed around Irvine, slowly forming a fist around the heated flesh that sprang to life. He began to stroke Irvineís penis up and down with practiced wisdom, stopping every now and then when his loverís hips began to thrust upwards eagerly. He knew how to draw the pleasure on for hours with his marvelous talent and skill. But he soon lost his concentration when the young SeeDís moaning drowned out his senses.

"Please SeiferÖ" Irvineís knees were shaking, his lower body felt like Jello. He hated to be reduced to begging but he craved the impulses inside his brain. The forbidden knowledge of what Seifer could show him, teach him, share with him. "Seifer!" He whimpered, tossing his head back when the threat of an orgasm rocketed through his body.

Watching the sharpshooter thrash about like that pushed a painful constraint on Seiferís groin area. He couldnít recall when he had managed to get his pants undone but they pooled around his bent knees as he knelt between Irvineís open legs. And those long, finely sculpted legs were parting further as Irvine pleaded for more. He probably wasnít even quite sure of what he was asking for. To prevent the cowboy from losing his mobility later on, Seifer expertly lifted both legs over his shoulders as he crept in closer. Spreading Irvine wide open until he could duck his head inwards to flick the tip of his tongue over the hard length that beckoned him to do so.

"Seifer!" Irvine croaked hoarsely, attempting to jerk his legs out of Seiferís grasp but pushing at him simultaneously.

"Itís okay," Seifer murmured, running one hand over the boyís chest to feel his heavily beating heart. "Weíre alone out here, nobody will hear you."

"Hear me?"

Irvine understood only too well what Seifer was referring to once he felt an incredible wet heat engulf his penis in a cavern of luxurious pleasure. He didnít even recognize the strangled cry as his own, nor did he feel any shame at raising his hips upwards again. Accepting this gift that Seifer was giving him whether it was for the greater good or not.

Biting down on his closed fist to keep the noise to a minimum, Irvineís eyes began to water, becoming consumed with ecstasy. Never before had he felt so alive, so desired, so Ö loved. Did Seifer love him?

When a set of teeth gently scraped the underside of Irvineís cock, his mouth fell open, wordlessly gasping while his entire body quaked. ~Oh gods, I think Iím going to die.~ His throat was too dry to scream but it didnít stop him from trying when his stomach muscles began to clench in an attempt to control the contractions. He failed, ramming his hips hard into Seifer out of instinct, vision blurring when a sudden impulse tightened in him. Then, Irvine was cumming, alarmed at how quick and powerful his release came.

For Seifer, he couldnít have been happier. Sucking away on Irvine until the cowboy lay back, satiated and exhausted. Even then, the older man was still licking Irvine dry, swallowing everything with one satisfied gulp.

"Irvine?"

Seifer carefully placed Irvineís legs back on the ground, crawling up to pull the quivering young man into his arms.

"Irvine?"

"Hmmm?"

Seifer gazed down into those delirious eyes, that swam with so many emotions, and pressed his lips to Irvineís until they closed again. Their kiss was so urgent and overwhelming that it reminded Seifer he was far from the pleasant state that Irvine was in. His tongue probed that delicious mouth, wondering how he would get his lover to consent to fulfilling his need. Seifer was about to separate for air when Irvine pulled him back down. Tugging until Seifer lost his balance and nearly flattened his lover on the grass. But Irvine persisted, kissing back harder, wanting to taste Seifer, bewildered by the flavor of his own essence whetting his appetite. When they did break contact, it was with reluctance from both sides.

"Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you look?" Seifer licked Irvineís lips with his tongue, smiling affectionately when Irvine mimicked him to entangle their mouths in another kiss.

"Only older men," he joked slyly.

"Oh? And how do the women describe you?"

"Unattainable."

"Well Iím sure that neither of them have had the privilege of seeing you on display like this." He gently patted Irvineís cheek. "Your skin looks so pretty after a decent workout. Even in the dead of night it glows with vigor."

"Maybe itís because of thisÖ" Irvine reached down and grasped Seiferís erect penis, gritting his teeth against the shyness that overcame him. He didnít want to let go for fear of offending Seifer but he wasnít feeling too sure of himself anymore. The organ seemed so big and hard andÖ

Seiferís hands were on both sides of Irvineís face, urging him to relax. "I donít think youíre ready for that."

"I want to do the same thing for you."

"That isnít what I want. Not tonight."

Irvine puzzled over that. "Then what do you want?"

Seifer appraised the delectable, naked body underneath his own, moving Irvineís hand away to grind his hips downwards. He succeeded in stirring a reaction in the boyís limp penis, working harder to the point where Irvine was hissing through his teeth.

The man trailed one finger up Irvineís thigh then dipped lower, fingering the tiny entrance that awaited. "I want inside you," he whispered throatily. "I want to fuck you, Irvine."

Irvine was silent, not knowing how he should respond to that kind of bluntness.

"Well?"

"I donít know."

"You have the right to refuse," Seifer reminded his lover, hoping that he hadnít encouraged Irvine to do just that. "I would never rape you. But just imagine how wonderful it will feel to experience this with me."

"I love you," Irvine said very quietly.

Seifer could only look sad, kissing away his loverís falling tears. "I wish I could love you, Irvine. But if I didÖ"

"I know." Irvine regretted ruining their perfect mood, choosing to smile up at Seifer without any negative thoughts. "I just wanted to say itÖ" He didnít even blink when the persistent finger pressed into his virginal opening.

Taking Irvineís passiveness as consent, Seifer pushed his finger in further, lust temporarily making him forget how painful it made his lover feel. The muscles within were too tight, clamping around Seiferís finger as he withdrew. "I have just the thing for you, my love." He ignored that slip, allowing Irvine to take comfort in the truth that Seifer refused to say.

Seifer picked up his discarded duster and unbuttoned one of the pockets, removing a vial of gleaming oil. Normally he used it on his beloved gunblade however, anointing Irvineís innocence with the fragrant ointment held much more appeal. And that was exactly what he did, pouring a generous amount into both hands and then working it in and out of his lover. He also covered his erection with the oil until it glistened readily.

By that time, Irvine was panting and moaning harshly, set ablaze once more by Seiferís ministrations. He hissed when slippery hands gripped and squeezed his buttocks, separating them for one or two fingers to enter. What he was not prepared for took the form of a wet, persistent tongue slithering up his thighs. It resembled a moist lightning bolt, penetrating him over and over again, leaving him in a trembling mass once more.

Somehow, from the time it took Irvine to get accustomed to the empty feeling of Seiferís fingers and tongue disappearing, he missed the shifting of the manís body. A sharp agonized wail escaped him as the head of Seiferís penis prodded him. He frantically dug his fingernails into the dirt at his sides, clawing at anything to remove him from that pain. It didnít relent, only eased in half an inch with Seifer grunting from the effort of holding very still and patient.

"If you relax it wonít hurt as much," Seifer muttered, chewing away at his bottom lip while going in as slow as he could manage. Both of his arms were busy holding Irvineís legs apart so he couldnít deal with the fingernails that went after his shoulders. He would have a stiff neck come morning. Irvine tried to pull himself into a sitting position but collapsed again, heaving as more of Seiferís lubricated cock drove into him. Neither of them knew when the gentle movements changed into ones of frustration and a pure frenzy of lust. But Seifer was not too far gone to revel in Irvineís own thrusts that met him halfway. He heard his lover cry out when he thrust in completely, pushing as far as he could against the resistance. His tip grazed something sensitive within Irvine that had them both reeling from the affects. Twice he poked into that tenderness and listened to Irvine scream in fevered ecstasy.

"HarderÖ fuck me harder," Irvine purred seductively, wanting Seifer to fill the empty void inside of him. To stroke every crevice of his being that had not already been graced by this form of attention - this love that Seifer had for him.

Seifer grunted in assent, lifting Irvine into his lap so that he could screw him as deep as possible. His fingers moving up the cowboyís hot, sweaty flesh to pinch his nipples and massage them with the sand-paper feel of his thumbs. Caressing downwards again to grip Irvine by his slim waist and aid him in moving up and down on his shaft. Their pace sped up with Irvine shouting "yes, yes, yes," every time he was impaled fully by Seiferís engorged penis.

Finally, Seifer could take it no more and clamped his hands solidly onto Irvineís bottom, crushing him totally as he pushed against the boyís limitations. Irvineís mind sizzled with overload, unable to deal with the extent of pleasure he had been given. With one last cry, he slumped forward into Seiferís open arms, unconscious before the man could even finish expelling his seed.

For a long time, both young men stayed in that position. One was fast asleep and the other had trouble disconnecting where their bodies had locked together. Seifer kissed Irvineís eyelids, embracing him tightly. He never wanted to let go but their lovemaking had apparently taken up much of the early morning. Daybreak would be upon them soon and if Irvine didnít make it back to camp before the others awoke, their suspicions would rise.

"Irvine. Come on now, we donít have all day."

Irvine roused from his slumber, blinking up at the sunlight in a daze. "Did I fall asleep?" He mumbled.

"Indeed you did, precious." He smiled at the sleepy expression on his loverís face before untangling their limbs. He tried not to react when Irvine watched him getting dressed. "How do you feel?" Seifer asked as he zipped his pants and clipped on his belt.

"Kind of sore."

"Do you need help getting your clothes on?"

Irvine licked his dry lips. "MaybeÖ"

Seifer offered Irvine a flask of water, holding it to his lips while he thirstily drank the contents. "About what we didÖ" He waited for the big drowsy eyes to look in his direction. "I enjoyed every minute of it."

"So did I." A big smile lit up Irvineís face, turning him into a perfect target for Seiferís claiming kiss that stole his breath away.

"I know that this is a lot to askÖ but Iíd like to see you again."

"You donít have to ask."

Then Irvine was tumbling with Seifer in a carpet of moist grass as he tackled him. "Iíll come to get you," Seifer promised, holding Irvine aloft by his arms. He felt pretty smug when Irvine looked astonished at his strength. "Look for me at night. It isnít safe to meet in the day."

"I understand."

Irvine took his sweet time buttoning up his shirt while Seifer kept glancing furtively over his shoulder, afraid that Squall would find them at any moment. When Irvine tried to stand, the real trouble presented itself. He wobbled for a second before sinking back onto his knees with a gasp of pain.

"Whatís the matter?" Seiferís voice escalated with panic, deathly frightened that he had actually injured Irvine. He crouched down, hugging Irvine possessively.

"I canít walk," Irvine moaned shamefully. "I never thought it would hurt this much."

"I doubt you gave it any thought at all." Seifer blamed himself for that. "I shouldnít haveÖ"

"I donít regret anything we did," Irvine interrupted. "It was going to hurt whenever you did it." He cheered himself up by imaging how intense their next union would be.

This scenario was driving Seifer insane. He couldnít leave Irvine out here alone, especially not when he was hurt and bleeding. He did figure that it was best not to bring up the issue of bleeding to his lover. That would definitely spoil what had transpired in those many hours of primal carnality. How he longed to just eat Irvine up.

"Iíll carry you."

"What? Do you want to die?" Irvine folded a blanket from his picnic into the bag he had taken with him and then buried the book in there too. "Squall will shoot you on first sight."

"Iíll be careful."

"No! I can get back on my own."

Irvine tried to get up a second time but collapsed, this time in tears. He lay sprawled there, moaning and gasping until Seifer held him close again.

"I will not leave you here like this. Argue all you want. Iím taking you back to your stupid SeeD camp, Squall or no Squall."

Their journey back through the marshlands took longer than Seifer expected, mainly because he was carrying an extra weight with him. It proved to be extremely difficult wading into monster-infested waters with his lover curled up in his arms, a gunblade secured to his back and an annoying picnic bag hanging from his left wrist. The wry humor of this gave way to a fit of laughter.

"Shh!" Irvine protested. "The campsite is just beyond those trees."

"Do you really think that Iím afraid of Squall? That puny, infantile punk?!"

"Okay, if not for your sake then please for mine?"

"Very well." Seifer quietly tiptoed into the campgrounds, cautious not to rustle against any tents that he passed by. "You just had to put yours a mile away," he muttered quietly. "It resembles a caved-in pile of laundry sheets. Who taught you how to survive in the wilderness? Squall?"

Irvine giggled. "Zell." He inclined his head for Seifer to see the ugly masterpiece of a tent that had to belong to Zell.

"That explains it." Seifer set Irvine down inside the tent, tucking him into the sleeping bag. They shared one last smoldering kiss before Seifer backed away. "Take care of yourself, Irvine."

"I love you, Seifer," Irvine replied, praying that he would not be rejected now that they might never see each other again.

"I love you as well, Irvine." Seifer hastily departed so that his lover would not see the distressed tears that he shed.

The only person that watched Seifer venture deep into the marshlands again was not Irvine. Those eyes were dark, angry and unforgiving. Hatred burning a stake through Seiferís back. They changed direction, taking in Irvineís crumpled tent and the footprints leading up to it. What had transpired between those two men that should be sworn enemies?

Zell peeked into Irvineís tent, parting the flaps to witness the peaceful expression on the sharpshooterís sleeping face. He looked so angelic and innocent in that pose that it made Zell sick to his stomach. He had expected to find his comrade lying close to death, tortured by Edeaís evil knight. Instead all he saw was normal tranquility marred by the scent of musk, heavily leaden with sex.

~Irvine and Seifer?~

Zell ripped apart the flaps, startling Irvine into a livid blushing mess of embarrassment.

"Zell! Canít you knock?" He joked. "Iím hardly decent."

"Save it, pretty-boy." Zell bristled as the smell of sweat, semen and fresh dewdrops reached his nostrils. He braved it and barged in on Irvineís personal space, glaring at him with animosity. "You traitor," he spat. "I knew that we couldnít trust you. I warned Squall but he wouldnít listen."

"WÖwhat are you talking about?"

"You know damn fine what Iím talking about! I hope that your night in the sac with Seifer was worth it because itís going to cost you." He snickered at Irvine, who could only lie there and take the verbal lashing. "Something wrong, cowboy? Was Seifer too rough with you?"

Irvine sat up straight, cringing when his spine stiffened with residual pains. "Donít you dare cheapen what we did! You donít know how we feel for each other. You have no right to judge."

"I canít believe that you actually think a guy that calls me Ďchicken wussí feels anything for you. Are you really that gullible or are you on his side now?"

"Stop it!" Irvine covered his ears with his hands, on the verge of breaking down. He didnít appreciate the guilty feeling that Zell was invoking in him. "Shut up! Shut up! Shut the fuck up!"

Zell was on a roll, sitting down beside Irvine with a mocking smirk on his face. "How long have you been Seiferís personal, slutty toy? Iíll bet that you were his slut long before you even joined our group."

That did it. Irvine punched at Zell with all of his remaining strength, devastated when his knuckles hit the young manís palm. Then those fingers were crushing Irvineís hand, forcing him into more misery.

"I love him, Zell. You canít possibly understand!" Irvine yanked back his fist, sobbing into his hands in a fit of despair. "I donít care if you understand! You have noÖ"

Zell clamped his hand over Irvineís mouth, staring him straight in the eyes. "Actually, I do understand how it feels to love someone who you can never be with." He kept his hand firmly in place, keeping Irvine quiet. "Squall will be waking up soon and the last thing you want is for him to hear you screaming and yelling." Slowly, he released Irvine, grateful when the shouting didnít continue. "Just the sight of Seifer makes me so mad. I hate him! I hate him for how he treated me and the bad things heís done. And I hate it even more to admit that he is giving you any form of happiness. I know youíre not on his sideÖ but I also know that you canít be on our side."

"ZellÖ pleaseÖ last night was the first time I saw Seifer alone. Donít tell Squall. Iím not a traitor."

"I have no intention of telling Squall." Zell moved away, gazing out of the tent to see Squall stretching outside of his tent from across the campfire. "Like I said, I can relate to what youíre going through. You want to be with somebody so badÖ and it ruins your judgment."

"My judgment is fine."

"It wonít be when we go into battle against Seifer. You wonít fight him."

"I will! If he stops us from getting to Edea, I will fight him."

"You wonít," Zell insisted. He studied Irvine with pity in his blue eyes and a haggard expression on his face. "IrvineÖ thereís something that you should know. Iím only going to tell you to put things into perspective."

Irvine combed his fingers through his hair, blotting out his tears on the sleeping bag. "Donít tell me youíre in love with Edea," he sniffed.

"Squall and I were loversÖonce."

Irvine gaped at him, unable to comprehend what he had just heard.

"He said that we never should have been, that there were too many reasons why it wouldnít work out. I convinced him that none of those reasons matteredÖ so we became intimate. Every night we would sneak into his tent or hotel room to make love or make promises that we couldnít keep. It went on for months untilÖ Squallís damned reasons came back and bit me in the ass."

"What happened?"

"We were in the middle of battle and everything was going fine. It was your typical dragon attack in one of the canyons, northwest of here. Nothing could have gone wrongÖ except when I acted like my clumsy self and tripped. I didnít even sprain my ankle but I did shout in pain. That one single sound distracted Squall from his own fight. Made him nearly drop his sword. He was on the verge of coming to help me because he had assumed the worst. Squall turned his back for one secondÖ and the next thing I knew, he was being flown by an emergency helicopter to the nearest hospital." Zell narrowed his eyes at the bitter memory. "After that, things between us changed. Squall no longer felt he could trust me or himself when we were together and I felt so guilty. Things ended on a rough spot and have never been right since then."

Having listened to the mournful tale, Irvine could only bow his head to think.

"As much as I hate Seifer, I would not want to kill him just because he happened to be looking at you in the midst of a battle. I donít want you to watch Squall kill Seifer, knowing that you love the idiot this much. And as annoying as you are, cowboy, I donít want Squall killing you."

Then Zell turned to leave.

"Zell!"

Zell nodded, already well aware of what was on Irvineís mind. "Iíll tell Squall that youíre sick. If he sees the footprints going into the marsh... Iíll say I went for a walk this morning."

"Thank you." Irvine called out softly as Zell retreated. He had far too much on his mind to worry about what Squall would think. As Zell had pointed out, there were far larger problems to contend with.  Despite the prime example that Zell had used to deter Irvine from seeing Seifer again, it had fallen on deaf ears.  Whatever had developed between them was too complicated and special to destroy or attempt to hide.  From the first day that Irvine had met Seifer, he knew that it had to be love and if there was one thing that could not be taken from him, it was that love.


The End

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