Author's Notes: Happy Samhain Sabbat everyone.
Disclaimer: THEYíRE NOT MIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
They haunt a lot of people.
Dreams are messages.
Messages from the subconscious.
They can tell us our deepest desires.
Our deepest fears.
Some people spend their whole lives chasing dreams.
I spent most of mine chasing fragments.
I never thought I found anything.
I know now, I did find something.
Something that was always thereÖ
I have had the same dream for weeks now. The signs are all wrongÖ but the message? I donít need to hear it to know what the message is.
Iím standing on the black shore to a lake. The surface is black, like silk and all is still.
Something hits the water to the left, four rings ripple away from it. The object has not entered the water, but I know, it hovers above the water, waiting. Waiting for me to notice it, and give it life.
The moon is full, and a beautiful blue aura surrounds it.
I look at the person who caused the ripple.
Itís always him.
Wearing only a white sash, that is held up by the wind. I know it is so light that it could blow away on the non-existing breeze at any moment.
One moment he is a picture, a figment of flying hair and deep green eyes.
The next, he is touching me, hands smoothing down my naked body, worshipping my fleshÖ
I always wake up, right before he kisses me. I wake up in a tangle of sheets, sweatingÖ even though Iím cold.
Heís coming. I know whom for. I know whenÖ and I know for how long.
I am past the point of scared.
I think Iím looking forward to it.
I lay on my bed slowly, my naked chest heaving as I do so.
I bring the covers to my chest.
My freshly washed blonde hair hangs in wet rivets down my neck, some strands actually reaching my upper back. Theyíll need to be cut soon.
Iíll be his.
I know I cannot stop it. I know I cannot resist. The dream has told me I have no choice.
The bottle of liquid seems looming and cold as I set it down on the dresser.
I am freezing.
The window is open. But I cannot close it.
Because that will speed things up, and that is not good. Everything has a time to come tonight, everything is in a certain place. Or things will be changed. For me, it is not wise to change anything.
I think itís some kind of joke. This night, of all other nights. Itís Halloween tonight. The time when the spirits of the dead are said to be closest to those of the living. Both a joke and a powerful construction.
I wonder, I wonder if someone set this up, made it possible.
The centra maybe.
I went with Tifa for treat or treating. She loved it, kept rubbing against me. She wanted me to take her tonight, because she thought I would be reminded of Arieth. I donít mourn Arieth the way I mourn him. I donít long for female companionship. Tifa wants me to, but I donít.
Everything from five in the afternoon onward has happened exactly like in the dream. Even my realising that it was from the dream. I wonderÖ I wonder if it will really stop right before he kisses me? Would that not be cruel.
I breath in slowly, I should be jumpy and upset, but I cant be, Iím calm.
Its freezing, and I huddle in the sheet, I want nothing better then to close the window and not see any living soul.
But Iím not going to see a living soul.
Iím going to be taken by a dead soul.
The beating of that one word fills my head, lulling me to sleep I close my blue eyes, and I know, the next time I open my eyes. Heíll be standing over me.
I wake up at one, my heart pounding, my skin is pale from the cold night air, I lean up on my hunches, looking around wildly. I know something has woken me up. I know something is wrong.
Nothing moves in the room.
My breath hitches as I see the window.
The window is closed.
I draw my knees up to my chest and I close my glowing eyes. A tear trails down my cheek.
The window is closed.
He wonít come now.
I sob quietly.
I was wrong.
I was so wrong.
I cry tears that are blue, heavy tears.
I should be happy.
But I can never be happy now.
I need him.
I fall to my side. Knees drawn against my stomach as I cry.
He didnít come.
Not for me.
I donít deserve anything.
I close my eyes sobbing silently.
Five years later, all hallows eve againÖ
Work was tiring. Dust clings to my forearms and legs, even under my clothing. It sticks in my hair in patches.
My sword clinks as I set it down against the wall. Moving heavily I kick my boots off. Loosing a good inch in height as I do so. I hate height requirements.
As I move toward the stairs of my house I pull off my smouldering gloves. Dropping them downward over the banister. I can pick them up after my shower. I fumble at the straps on my shirt, nudging open my bathroom door with a hip, the shirt drops to the ground outside the door to the left.
Finally inside the room I flick the buckles off my pants, the garment makes a sound like something coming out of compression as it comes lose. I step out of my pants and toss them into the hamper, along with my boxers. I pause infront of the mirror, stretching my arms above my head.
I look worked out. My muscles move solidly against my skin. I havenít grown an inch, unless you count hair, but my height. I know just how petit I am. Every bar I get sent to ask for my ID. They barely ever believe Iím in my twenties. Of course, no one believes Iím the Cloud Strife.
Whatís that supposed to mean anymore anyway?
I lean over and turn the shower on, the glass door moving out of my way of its own accord. Automatic shower doors. Top of the line. I earn a lot of money in my repair job, and the big bucks I get every week from the SHINRA Corporation. They seem to think that if they keep paying me, and doing favours, that eventually I will save them if they need a favour in return. I donít know if I will.
I think my whole image is getting overrated.
I saw my name in a shirt a day or two ago.
Everyone thinks Iím six foot packed like an ape and angry for blood. Yet they seem to idolise this imagery of me.
I canít decide to be offended or soak it up.
The water warms enough and I step inside the door closes behind me.
Its hard to believe how long its been since so many years ago when I practically went over the world chasing Sephiroth with Cid, Barret and the gang.
I let my head roll forward, just soaking up the water for a moment before rolling my head up. The hot water pounds down on my back, neck and hair. My hair seems to add on weight and plasters to my face. I move my hands up, pushing my soaking strands to the side so I can breathe.
Its even harder to believe that its Halloween againÖ
I tap a tile on the wall and it moves outward, then flips. My shampoo, conditioner and soaps displayed for the picking.
I did mention that I earn a lot of money.
Picking up the shampoo I squeeze a generous amount into my hands balancing the right amount. My left hand moves to the underside of my hair while my right covers the front. I run my hands through my hair, digging in deep and covering every inch with the shampoo. I move my hands until the shampoo is foamy before leaning back under the spray again. I take to breathing through my nose as the spray and my hands make the shampoo foam run down my face and the back of my head. Iíve learnt how bad shampoo really does taste. When I cant feel any more foam or silkiness I give my head one last rinse before moving out, wiping my eyes as best I can with my wet hands. After a moment I can see enough to pick up the conditioner. I apply it and run it through my hair more roughly.
I know most conditioners tell you to wait for it to set in. but I want something cold to drink before relaxing for the rest of the night, and I can still feel some of the dust on my muscles. I rinse the conditioner out, my hair becoming soft and silky in its wake. The suds and a bit of foam run down the drain.
Rinsing a bit more I reach out, picking up some of the soap getting a bit of water on it, so its not all hard and un-nice before starting on my collarbone. I move downward. Over my stomach before up again, down my arms and along my sides. Swapping hands for each side. I move down, carefully washing every inch of skin. I donít know how to dust did it, but it got through to my boxers too. I finish on the soles of my feet, washing them before putting my feet down.
I sigh as I go under the spray again. Watching as the very last of the dust and dirt trails down the drain, Iím smooth and clean again.
I need some caffeine. Preferably coke. Itís hard to believe, but Iím pretty damn addicted to coke. I canít remember who showed it too meÖ but I had someÖ and I keep having some.
I turn the showerhead off, moving out the door and picking up a towel, I move the towel to my head and rub vigorously for a few seconds. A moment later my hair miraculously stands in the right places. Of course itís drooping a bit from the water, but by the time I go to bed, it should be wonderful and soft.
I get down to drying off my waist before I stop. My eyes go wide and I look up from the tiles. A pair of pale, almost white feet that did not belong to me meets my eyes. I travel upward my heart stopping as I see a strand of silver hair around the thighs. Beautifully formed body, smooth skin.
The towel fell from my fingers and I moved upward as I stared, my mouth opening half way. Full mouth, shapely nose. Soft fingers. Full, thick beautiful silver hair cascading around his body. My eyes travelled upward to met his eyes, startling green orbs.
I think my knees gave out because the next thing I knew I was sitting on my ass on the tile floor. I just stared at him, unable to speak. Some men naked had that effect on a lot of women. But Sephiroth was the only male that has ever been able to do this to me.
"Ö" I managed. A soft chuckle echoed through the room from him. I took a sharp intake of breath. He bent down, I felt his strong arms wrap around my waist and pull me up and against his body. His flesh was cool to the touch, as if heíd been walking around naked for hours.
I had time to gasp before he tipped my chin up and kissed me.
It was strange, pressed against that pale skin, naked bodies touching with his lips on mine, I felt my eyes slide shut as I made a small sound in the back of my throat. His hands move down and over my back to my waist caressing my skin gently. I would never have thought he would be gentle. I thought he might be rough or angry, but the gentleness surprises me. I was prepared for him to take me without a care.
I open my mouth a little ways, emitting a small moan. His tongue slips between my parted lips and I find I have to wrap an arm around his neck to keep from collapsing. His tongue rubs against mine, making me shiver. One leg slides between my wet thighs and his thigh brushes softly against my hardening flesh. I close my eyes and break from the kiss, letting my head fall back and exposing my neck as I groan full out. I feel the need of him building up inside me. A need I had thought died years ago.
He moves his head, taking full advantage of my exposed neck, running his
tongue along my
We slam against the wall, a few steps from the bedroom, mouths hungry on each other. Heís gentle thoughts seemed to have dissolved into a hunger. Our erect flesh rubs against each other, beads of precum softening the small movements that we imitate. His mouth is like a hot cavern on mine. Total dominance of my body.
We move again, or he does rather. My legs are wrapped around his waist, my arms around his neck and my mouth devoured by his.
A few melting kisses later heís laying me down on my bed, his member slides down under mine touching under my thighs. I let my legs come undone from his waist, letting the soles of my feet rest on top of the bedsheets, my toes curled in. my hands go into his hair as he bites down on one of my nipples, suckling the hard flesh. It feels so good.
I know Iím making a lot of noise. Moans, pants and incoherent words spill from my mouth.
I think my final undoing is when he bends down, tongue playing over my hip bones before he just licks a long trail right up to my chest.
"Sephiroth!" I groan begging with my body. Eyes closed, cheeks flushed, chest heaving. Iíve never been good at withstanding any amount of sexual torture. According to all the lovers Iíve had, the image of me moaning and begging is utterly irresistible.
He grabs one of my legs, hoisting it up so the back of my knee rests on his shoulder, moving forward his rubs his hard member against my opening, a tease of a gesture, but his face is dangerous. "Is this what you want?" His voice is hard. The danger makes me grow harder and I moan softly. "Yes. PleaseÖ Sephiroth!" I burry my arms into the mound of sheets beneath me and move my hips closer.
The danger disappears. I knew it was just a facade, but it was still powerful. The danger replaces by one of lust. His eyes devour my body. I want to scream under his gaze. Iím hot and so god fucking ready.
"The tableÖ" I glance at the table with meaning and he sees the bottle. I watch as pale fingers snatch the bottle and he opens it with a single twist, practised. He scoops some of the cold substance out; flicking the bottle closed with a finger. I barely suppress a moan of wanton as he coats his own member, his eyes close. I know that the jelly is cold. He finishes and the excess jelly he gently uses to spread some over my opening. I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him hungrily. The next part is going to hurt and I want to distract myself from it as much as possible. The Ďgeneralí is not small.
I gasp as he enters me, my body contracting with the harsh penetration. My muscles ache as I feel his hot, jelly coated member fill me. I break from the kiss, slamming my head back into the bed. His shaft is inbedded so deep, so big. I can barely breath from the feeling. My fingers dig sharply into the bedspread. He makes a purring sound, I know he must feel wonderful with my walls around him. I finally draw in air, and pant softly.
"I can make it feel even better Cloud." With these words I feel him move out, I clench on his muscles, remembering a talent of milking a previous lover had spent hours enduring to teach me. The rich moan Sephiroth emits is enough to make me want to come right then and there by some miracle I hang on. He pushes in again, right to the hilt I scream in pure pleasure thrusting my head from side to side as he hits my prostate hard. I can see white on my vision. I scream again as we repeat the movement. His body is pure power, his movements strong and forceful. My vision is filled with white stars as he pushes so deeply into me.
I know Iím screaming, moaning, my body tossing. I know heís loving it. I know heís groaning with my tight muscles. I know heís enjoying the feel of my walls squeezing impossibly tight around him. I can feel every inch of his shaft and it feels so good. The only algony I can use to describe the sensation is being fucked into heaven. I move my legs further apart, as if he could go any deeper.
I scream his name when he does go deeper. "Sephiroth!" Iím crying it feels so good. Like some forbidden fruit.
The next sensation finishes me. His warm smooth fingers touching my flesh between my legs. I scream and cry as I come, coating both his chest and mine. He keeps pumping into me. So deep and full. I think I might go blind. He finally comes, hot and full deep inside my walls. I can fill some of his seed leaking out between my thighs. Iím panting. I know I am. he claims my lips again. Soft once more. I feel him pull out of me, the light calms down and I manage to peel open my eyes. I attach myself to his chest. We nip at each otherís lips softly, he brushes my tears away. I can still see small spots on my vision, my body aches with contentment.
I yawn slightly. "ÖHow, Sephiroth?"
He shrugs. "The light of your soulís desire was my guide. Though you expected me too soon. I was just starting to manifest five years ago. Your thought turmoilled and it took me longer, because your soulís desire was crushed. Youíre very impatient you know?"
I blink, wiping back tears as I find myself giving a small shaky laugh. I burry myself against his chest, mewling slightly.
"Youíre not crazy though?"
"Death can do that to a person."
"Shouldnít you be half decade?"
I blink, snuggling closer.
"Thatís the thingÖ" He says. He kisses me again; I tilt my neck up to reach.
"Wha?" I ask.
He continues kissing me, trailing down my chin, he speaks, head buried in my neck.
"Iím not aliveÖ nor am I decayingÖ"
"Then what are you?"
His lips part and he suckles slightly on my neck, a soft mumble fills the air and I blink. "A what?"
His answer comes without words. A soft, prick on my skin, I gasp suddenly feeling his tongue reach out to lick the welled up blood away.
"Youíll know by a nightís time my sweet Cloud. Iíll keep you forever."
I think I gasped again before his teeth sank into my neck and my blood flowed.
"Love is forever, it can be hurt and stabbed, it exists even in death. But lust is truly immortal. It lives in your very veins."
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